Layer Family including SuperSam

Busy Weekend

2009-11-08T21:18:00.009-07:00

My Girls....

So November started off with a BANG! Samantha's Sweet 16th Birthday. She wanted something special so Chris and I gave her a budget and she planned it all.

She managed to get it all in - a Limo ride for 12 to downtown Denver. Overnight stay at the Marriott and dinner at a fancy Italian restaurant.

She made reservations - sent invites and decorated the hotel room. I got to stay in the room next door - a blessing and a curse.

The room was nice and for the most part the evening was semi-peaceful.

Here is Sam with one of her friends all dressed up to hit the town.

12 young men and women all loaded into a stretch limo and headed downtown. I followed in the minivan. :)

After a quick stop to unload their bags and gifts - they headed to Magianos - a fancy Italian restaurant. I wasn't invited to sit with them but the waitress let me know they were all perfectly mannered.

Samantha got a special desert and they all loved the food.

It was surprisingly peaceful eating alone at the bar. My meal was fantastic, the wine was smooth and I didn't have to share the tirimasu.

After dinner they all took a long walk back to the hotel. The evening was beautiful and warm.

Downtown Denver on the 16th street mall is full of very colorful folks at night and while the kids thought they were up for it - they decided against hanging out at the street mall.

Back at the room we had a few hours of giggling and running around, but things settled down around midnight.

I fell asleep at 1:30 am and the girls (boys left at 11 pm) told me they crashed around 2:30 am.

They got up around 9 am - had some cinnamon rolls and went swimming. Then cleaned up and hit the mall during the day - a lot more normal. :)

When Sam finally made it home - she went straight to bed and slept an hour or so. We had a nice quiet family dinner and the rest is history.

I didn't get any of my chores done but what are you going to do?

Friday evening I took the big kids to see the Broadway play Wicked. We had a fancy dinner together and the show was fantastic! I love that I can take them to experience plays and such.

The weekend flew by but all in all I think the kids had a blast. I have the rest of the week to get caught up right?

We are definitely looking forward to Thanksgiving (my favorite holiday). The big kids are with their dad this year and spending it in Spokane with their grandparents. We will have the usual folks hopefully plus Kelly and Rich - Yeah!

We are enjoying the mild weather and plugging along. Jeremy mentioned that the upcoming week seems lighter than usual - maybe I will get to see him a bit more.

Isabella has teacher conferences - man time is flying so fast. We have 7 weeks before Christmas - ugh. Actually I am looking forward to the holidays. I won't be wishing for a peaceful holiday - I am accepting that we really don't live a peaceful life. But life is good and I am happy.

Night and Love to everyone!

Fall and My 5 Year Old

2009-10-04T21:41:00.014-06:00

My 5 year old! She is looking so sweet in her new princess pajamas and make shift crown. Even though her actual birthday was on Monday - we celebrated this weekend. She had many of her school friends come to a pink birthday party on Saturday. She asked for a pink princess crown cake.... The party was perfect. They all had so much fun!

Here is Isabella posing in her new Princess Jasmine costume.

Here is her cake - I was laughing so hard as I made it. The kitchen was a disaster and the cake caved in... Once a year I try to get creative with the kid's cakes - every year they barely turn out - but I keep trying!

The important thing was that Isabella LOVED her cake! All the girls got to take home a piece of the crown (it was made from sugar cookies).

After the girls headed home - the next wave arrived. I thought I was so smart planning both parties in the same day. It worked for the most part - the only lesson I need to remember is to plan more time between the 2. I was wrapping up the kids party as family was arriving for dinner. It was a mad rush to get all the food and munchies out on the table.

Cousin Kelly and Rich came and she made the best bruchetta I have every had. All in all it was another great night with family and friends. I love having a full house!

Jeremy has been working like a mad man to finish up the sun room. I finished painting the inside a couple of weekends ago and then last weekend we tiled the floor. I had the past week off from work and I was determined to get the house cleaned top to bottom and moved into my room. I was so excited to move into the sun room that I did it too soon. I had to keep moving the plants back out when Jeremy worked. I would move everything back in - only to find that he had something else to do and so it went - plants in ... plants out... plants in ... plants out...

But guess where I am now? In this beautiful room - happy as a clam! We have the sky light to finish up and the threshold to the room - everything else is done. Now I can start filling it with plants. I already have a couple of tomato plants - brought them in to save them from the frost.

Here are a few pictures.I think Reno loves this room just as much as I do. :)

Below is a the only picture I took of Isabella on her actual 5th birthday - she is such an Angel!

We had a small dinner on Monday night. She picked hot dogs and mac-n-cheese. She took carrot cake cupcakes to school (they request 'healthy' snacks and that is the best I can do...) and was really excited to share her birthday book with her class.

She had a great day - although now she when I ask her to take a rest she declares - "5 year olds do NOT takes rests!"

Now as promised - sorry for the delay - here are Samantha's pictures from Homecoming. As usual she is too beautiful. She danced the night away and had a great time. Next on my list is planning her Sweet 16 birthday party. (Man I am getting old!)

Daniel is loving his Art classes and so he doesn't complain about school too much right now. We turned in his Senior picture for the year book this past week and today we had a special breakfast meeting to discuss his college plans. He has a couple of ideas and we are just trying to get organized and make sure we meet all the deadlines. Of course he is applying for many many scholarships.

He has a pretty specific goal for his life, I am really proud of him. We will just have to wait and see if everything he is planning actually turns out for him.

Jeremy is doing great - he was battling a nasty cold (Sam and Daniel as well) but I think that is under control for now. He is feeling good again and has started working out with me at the fitness center.

Every day lately, I am smiling. Fall is my favorite time of year. I absolutely love all the colors and the crisp air. I am trying to prolong my tomato season until I get a few more ripe ones - but my pumpkins are bright orange and my mums are blooming. I am ready!

Until next time - Love to everyone!

Cone Head is back

2009-09-12T22:41:00.022-06:00

So just a few things happening. We found out that the reason that Roxy was still hobbling around after surgery on her right knee was that her left knee had a torn ACL as well. Roxy came home from the surgery last night and she is sleeping with her cone again.

We have had a couple of really nice weeks (minus work of course). I watched a big orange moon rise over the city while I was listening and watching the Allman Brothers at Red Rocks. Then we headed up to the tipi with cousin Kelly and Rich. TG and his friend Katelyn came up for dinner. It was a bit cold but a lot of fun!

Kelly and Isabella are posing next to her forest princess house. Rich is relaxing by the campfire - and check out my great view.

Yesterday Samantha and Isabella decided to make some gourmet cupcakes. I should have taken a picture of the kitchen after but I think the chaos would have cracked the camera lens.

Here is Isabella's cupcake - just a few pink sprinkles...

Today we did some running around to get the makings of Samantha's costume for the Miracle party. This year's theme was super hero. It is always really nice to see all the kids we spent a year or so with from the hospital, but it is bitter sweet. A couple of the kids are in really scary situations - waiting in limbo to see what may happen. Some have passed and some are thriving like Samantha. We also had to say good bye to Dr. Ball tonight. That was much harder than anticipated - he is our Super Hero. He has finished his fellowship and is moving back to Alabama. I am sure we will get another great doctor but it won't be the same.

Super Sam showing off her costume - Isabella celebrating that fact that she just ate 3 mini brownies. The meshy photo is Isabella jumping away in the princess jumpy house (we spent most of our time here).

The big golden 'S' for Super Sam!

I try so hard to keep the focus on living a normal life - going back and thinking about all this is hard - on Samantha as well. Maybe it will get easier - until then we will be grateful that the cancer is gone and try to promote childhood cancer awareness any way we can.

Just a note that my tomatoes are getting red and black (my black krim variety) and my pumpkins are vibrant orange. We have been eating yummy broccoli and zucchini squash as well; however, my watermelons were a bust. The bugs ate them before I had a chance...

I will be learning the art of canning soon - I hope! :)

Night and love to everyone!!!

First Day of School

2009-08-31T20:55:00.005-06:00

So here are my kids. Daniel is a Senior, Sam is a Sophomore and Isabella started kindergarten today. She is so proud of her clipboard and blue folder. We all have been doing great. Last Thursday Samantha had her 3 month scans. She is still cancer free and her leg strength is improving by leaps and bounds.

Samantha has been working really hard - doing her exercises regularly and going to PT weekly. She recently added a water workout and it is helping. I bet she will be crutch free by Christmas!

Daniel finally got his school schedule dialed. We had a bit of a problem - it seems that no one checked his options last year and at first he didn't meet minimum requirements. He thought he was going to sail thru the last year only taking PE and Art classes. But now he has a full schedule including the Art, PE, gov't, speech and journalism. He is a good sport about it and is really happy that he could keep his Art classes.

Samantha's main concern now is to get her driver's permit so she can start driving. I am not too excited about it but it is something I know must happen. - UG

GrandBob just spent a week with us and Isabella had a blast. She prepared for school and when I dropped her there today - she was glowing. Pretty soon she will have homework like the big kids. I wish they could keep the excitement for school for all 12 years :)!

One really important note: September is Childhood Cancer Awareness Month. It still is not getting a lot of attention - but everyone can help by letting other folks know. We will be going to the Miracle Party again this year. We will be thinking of all the kids who have been diagnosed this past year and some who have had their cancers come back. It has been a couple rough months. A son of one of my cancer mom's had his cancer come back and he has been going thru chemo again for a couple months now. Samantha also has a friend from her cancer camp that just started chemo when her cancer showed up again. Another boy who we know from treatment and cancer camps had a spot show up on his lung this past Thursday on scan day. All these stories are a constant reminder how lucky we are and how fast everything can change.

Until next time - Love to everyone!

Still Here - Just really Busy!

2009-08-16T21:50:00.003-06:00

So let's see - the last blog was back in June - right? It seems like I just updated but it has been almost all summer and not a word. Sorry!

It is mainly work's fault (there ya go - I knew there was something to blame). Part of my job is to handle escalations and I had my very first BIG one. I can usually keep them under control for the most part, but this time it just was not in the cards. I worked thru June and July on this - sometimes up until Midnight, but this is what I get paid for. So I do it - but the blog doesn't get updated....

We had a great time back east - visiting family and celebrating Hannah's graduation. We got to visit the Statue of Liberty (in the poring rain) and show the kids some of Jeremy's old haunts.

Samantha and Daniel have been pretty busy all summer attending camps. Their first is Wapiyapi - their favorite. It is a cancer camp for patients and their siblings. Next year Daniel will be a volunteer!

Then Daniel did a Graphic Arts camp out of the Art institute here in Denver. It was an industrial art camp - he designed and created, from scratch, a pretty creative clock. Once he has it completely finished, I will post a picture. His design was a bit ambitious for a 4 day camp...

Sam got to go to another Jonas Brothers concert and then it was time for Sky High Hope camp, another cancer camp that also invites siblings. This one is a bit more structured but still A LOT of fun. Some of Daniel and Samantha's closest friends are from their camps.

We also did the Courage Classic again this year. Daniel did it too. The first day he had to ride alone and he kicked butt! Jeremy had a respectable finish in a 50 mile off road race while I recovered from working all night and a stomach bug. But we were all fresh and ready for day 2. It was a beautiful day riding the mountain trails from Copper to Frisco to Keystone over a small mountain down into Breckenridge and then back to Frisco and Copper. Samantha made a fantastic (garlic rich) Spaghetti and meatball dinner for us to top off a wonderful day. Day 3 is always the scary one for me - we climb to the highest elevation of the event from Copper and finish back in Leadville. I did better this year than last ( a bit quicker) and we all had a great time. Daniel and I crossed the finish line together which was the best feeling in the world. Samantha, Jeremy (who rode back after the climb and picked up Sam and Iz) and Isabella were there waiting for us!

Then we were off to Cody for a family visit. It is always nice to go back and get a chance to relax and see my Grandma and Grandpa Hedderman as well as everyone else. I wish I could hang out more with the cousins but such is life. I am super jealous of my mom - she is getting her dream greenhouse, but I came home with gobs of plant cuttings and some seeds to start myself.

We were home for a day and then off again to Leadville to cheer Jeremy over the finish line of a 100 mile off road mountain bike race. It was super crazy - Lance Armstrong competed last year and since he didn't win - came back again this year. Jeremy didn't beat Lance but he finished after battling hours of rain - then super high elevation sun - then more rain and sleet even... I am always amazed at the amount of people participating. It is such a great accomplishment.

Anyway we are home - for about 8 hours now. I have piles of wash to do and a house to clean - but that can all wait. I also have over 1000 emails to go thru from my week off - but instead of working I decided to update - am I forgiven? I know that I haven't added any pictures this time, but they are all loaded onto Facebook. Here is the link for those of you not on facebook currently - http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2015049&id=1247830976&l=6fe52ac425.

The kids all start school this week - Daniel is a Senior, Sam a Sophomore and Isabella starts kindergarten. I know that I will live thru all this but I anticipate many glasses of wine over the next school year. I had to order Daniel's cap and gown and I even have the graduation date.... (May 19th or so). Samantha is doing fantastic with walking, she is still on one crutch but is looking great! She will be able to handle full days this year. Daniel will probably cruise thru since he is only taking Art and PE classes to finish up his requirements.

Jeremy and I will continue to plug along with work and I almost forgot to mention.... We are adding onto the house. I am getting a Sun room! It will be a pseudo home office for me with a great view of my front garden. To save money we (mainly Jeremy) are doing most of the work ourselves. It is fantastic - in fact I am sitting in my unfinished room right now! :)

Well - I am off to bed - the first day back after a vacation is hell....
Wish me luck! :)

Love to everyone!

Off to Camp

2009-06-07T20:43:00.002-06:00

The last few weeks have been unbelievably busy. My poor cousin Kelly called me Friday evening - just as Isabella and her friend let the dogs out into the backyard and Roxy proceeded to eat my squash plants. I coaxed her into the house with the promise of a dog treat only to have my front doorbell ring and have to prevent the dogs from tackling our guest.

I took care of the visitor (they were here to borrow something) and as soon as they left - Samantha made it very clear I was to leave and pick her up from dinner at her dad's house so we could do some shopping to prepare for her week at Camp Wapiyapi. I breathed a sigh of relief as I crawled into bed around 11pm - proud with myself that I made it thru the day.

Saturday morning - Isabella was off to tackle an adventure with Jeremy while Samantha and I again hit the malls to find some shoes that would fit over her new leg brace (zebra striped of course). I don't know where Samantha came from - she is so organized - a list for everything...

Sunday morning we wrapped up everything and after loading 3 bags, a sleeping bag and over sized pink pillow - we headed off to Camp Wapiyapi. It started out as a beautiful day but as we climbed higher into the foothills it actually started snowing! Can you believe it?

Oh well - camp drop off went smoothly - both Daniel and Samantha are there right now and probably having the time of their lives. They were so excited - I love the fact that this is something they can do together . It reminds Daniel how much Sam went thru and Samantha has a chance to feel normal.

It is a bit hard on Jeremy and myself - we work so hard to keep our family life normal - seeing children with no hair and boxes full of medications can be a bit overwhelming. But it also reminds us how far we have come and how wonderful it is that Sam is 15 months cancer free!

Anyway - we dropped off Sam at camp and headed back to the sunshine (sort of) at the lower elevations. We had a great lunch in Lyons. Jeremy promised to take Isabella fishing - she just got a brand new pink fishing pole. We found the perfect spot and I pulled out a book (yes a real book) to read.

Get this - Isabella's first time fishing - probably the 3rd cast - she actually caught a fish! She was super excited but as soon as Jeremy took out the hook to let her hold the fish - it started flipping and flopping. It jumped right out of her hands as she screamed like a little girl.

I was really lucky to get this picture.

Needless to say after all this excitement she decided it was time to go home. Just in time as the gray clouds rolled in...

We arrived home at to a dirty house (2 weeks in a row that I have not been able to do my regular cleaning). I was able to work a bit in my garden - do some weeding and set up a makeshift support for Isabella's peas. We also did a bit of rearranging to prepare for my new sun room. Yes you read right - we are adding an addition to the house. Since we can't afford to move any time soon - Jeremy decided that we can put on a sun room. We couldn't afford to have all of it contracted out but we have someone doing as much as we could afford and Jeremy and I will do the rest. I am more than excited - I am planning on moving my office into this room. I will actually be able to keep the kitchen table clear and have beautiful scenery to look at all day as I work.

Well - it is time for me to wrap this up. I am hoping to soak a bit in the jacuzzi tonight and mentally prepare for another 'fun' day at work.

Take care - Love to everyone!

Lovin Life

2009-05-25T20:36:00.010-06:00

Sitting here listening to the rain outside - having a glass of wine and a piece of chocolate. We had a fantastic weekend.

Samantha has wanted a chance to get out of town for a long time now. We took her to Gunnison - but it wasn't the same. Thru Gold Ribbon Families (my cancer mom support group) we received an opportunity to stay at Keystone Ski Resort for free. It was perfect. The weather here in Denver was overcast and raining so we wouldn't have been able to do much outside anyway. The weather in the mountain was about the same but there is something about sitting in a jacuzzi in the rain that is really relaxing. The outdoor pool was heated so the kids pretty much lived there for 3 days straight. Jeremy and I got to read books and Daniel and I went for a couple of bike rides.

It was exactly what Samantha wanted. The best part was that all kids got along - Isabella was a bit cranky after no naps for 3 days straight - but for the most part is was a drama free weekend!

Life has been rolling along - Jeremy got a clean bill of health last week and now gets to ride his bike to his hearts content. Daniel and Samantha have only 1 more week of school (finals) and then they are off to Camp Wapiyapi. Isabella has her Cultural event marking the end of her school year on Friday. I hope summer goes well for her - a lot of her regular friends won't be going to the summer program. There is one little boy - just turned 6 - that likes Isabella. He walked up to Jeremy on day and handed his phone number to him and said, "Have her call me."

Every time Isabella refers to him - she says his whole name - Aidan Fransisco Carnivalli - never just Aidan. He is a line backer of a 6 year old who loves to play basket ball and chase the girls. Isabella finally gave him a call tonight and they talked for almost 20 minutes. Oh man....

Daniel was eyeing these 2 girls around the pool this weekend - they were young looking and well rounded. Later in the evening I was sitting in the jacuzzi watching the girls play in the pool when those same 2 girls slipped in. Two young boys also showed up and I was trying really hard to not listen to their conversation. I wasn't successful - however, I overheard them mention their age - 13! It was so fun to tell Daniel his 2 "hot" girls were only 13... Sometimes being a mom really pays off. :) Oh the love life of my children.

Work is interesting - busy as I try to justify my role to my customers. I was successful with one of them and I have until August to convince my other one. In the meantime we have Hannah's graduation in a couple of weeks, I am hoping to get to a girls weekend away to Austin and then the Courage Classic. Stay tuned for info on that - I will be asking for donations! I want to get to Cody for a bit and also go to Washington to visit Dianna at some point.

I have been spending most of my spare time working on my garden. Jeremy put in another garden for me on Mother's Day. I have cauliflower, broccoli, carrots, peas, onions and tomatoes in one garden. In the other one I have 2 kinds of squash, cucumbers, watermelon and pumpkins in the other. I also planted some raspberry and blackberry bushes. The yard is really coming along. I so love to walk thru my yard and look at all the new growth. I quite a bit of weeding to do - but it is definitely a labor of love.

We also got the ok ( well Jeremy GAVE the ok) to finally get started on an addition to the house. Jeremy and I are going to build a sun room off of the main living room of the house. Originally when we received quotes it was for the whole kit and kaboodle and totally out of our budget - but this time we are only hiring out the foundation. We will be doing the rest of the work. I am so excited - big windows and a space to grow even more plants. I am going to move my work area into there as well. We are thinking it should be done by October.

I hope everyone else is plugging along like us. Normal is wonderful!

I wish normal for everyone!

Love!

Another Near Miss

2009-04-02T21:04:00.008-06:00

Jeremy is feeling alright today. Pain is being managed with Ibuprofen for the most part. We met with an Orthopedic surgeon today and found out that - once again - Jeremy is lucky. He has a medial clavicle break most likely. The doctor only sees this severe collarbone break every 10 years or so. It dislocated to the front of his chest which is really good, since if it would have gone the other way - Jeremy would not have made it. Usually (50% of the time) the heart or artery is punctured. I don't know about all of you, but hearing that my husband was so close to dying yet again is not getting any easier.

You can see the helmet damage from the first picture - the major scrapes, the clip is pretty much gone (my finger is pointing to it) and the protected chin flap has a good sized gash. He can be the poster child for wearing a helmet when skiing. That Natasha actress wasn't wearing hers and only took a minor fall. Jeremy would have been a goner...

Noah captured the next 2 pictures of the ski patrol loading him up. Jeremy has no memory of this part. Noah says he was pretty ashen and didn't open his eyes.

I have to confess I get a little bit angry when I look at these pictures. Not to make this about me, but I have been looking at major scars over my daughters body and then to see Jeremy in pain and his chest all malformed - I feel like puking. Jeremy is quite a stud - he handles all this with ease. He wasn't being reckless - this was just a freak accident. His odds are actually pretty good - he has been skiing 33 years and this is the worse thing that has happened. That actress was on the bunny hill and it turned out much worse for her.

I guess when you lead an active lifestyle things like this will happen. Thank God for good drugs and insurance. I believe I have now met our out of pocket for both Samantha and Jeremy now - probably even the family amount. LOL

The doctor tried to get an idea of what his condition was exactly, but the x-rays didn't help. His shoulder is pushed down near the ribs and there is too much confusion looking at all the bones overlapping in the x-ray. Tomorrow we go back to the hospital to have a CAT Scan done which will give the doctor a better idea of what is going on. We will then meet with the doc again on Monday afternoon to find out the exact plan of attack. He will definitely need surgery and the doctor said is it pretty neat (his exact words) repairing this type of injury. Once the bone is put back together you can see the chest go back to it original shape.

I tried to capture the extent of the injury - You can see from the profile picture how is pec is flat and his shoulder bone is pushed back and down. We joke that he is the hunchback of Westminster... The front picture shows the bruise and how much lower his left nipple is than his right. What you can't see is how that whole muscle is kind of slumped down. Picture a landslide - everything gathered in a pile at the bottom of the hill. That is sort of what it is like. His jaw is still pretty swollen and a bit black and blue on the left side. He has been eating soup all day today...

All in all - he is doing great. He feels ok and is taking it easy. I think the toughest part of this whole thing is the fact that he will be sitting on the couch for another weekend (at least). I suspect the surgery will be on Wednesday but I will post again when we have all the details on Monday.

This could have turned out so much worse - we are blessed. I hope my Papa is feeling better (he is battling pneumonia). Love to everyone!

Just when you think you are out

2009-04-01T19:04:00.007-06:00

Just when I thought I was done with injured family members, doctor visits and hospitals - I get sucked backed in...

Jeremy broke his collarbone skiing today. He doesn't remember how it happened - his friend Noah saw him go into some rocks. Jeremy didn't just fall a little bit - he fell hard. Thank God for his helmet - which had the straps torn from it. I don't know if you can see from the pictures but he landed on the left side - his face is swollen and you can see the bruise where the collarbone is broken. It looks much better in the picture. You can't tell that it is thrust forward about an inch. He broke his bone all the way thru. We are meeting with an orthopedic surgeon tomorrow and I suspect that surgery will follow soon after.

He is doing ok now - comfortable for the most part. I will post again tomorrow to let everyone know how the doctors appointment goes.

Other than this latest drama, everyone else is doing well. Samantha went back to school on Monday and is happy to be back. She is pretty sharp and catching up on her class work like a pro.

Daniel was mad at me a bit today because he thought the news about Jeremy was an April Fool's joke and he thought it was a bad one. Isabella is glad to be back in school and hanging out with her friends. We signed her up for Kindergarten next year and she is getting really close to reading. She is still fighting it a bit - but I catch her sounding words out when she really wants to know what it says.

We are getting snow again - everything is white and crunchy. :)

Guess we are back in normal waters again - doctors appointments scheduled, prescription bottles on the counter and a glass of wine sitting next to my computer.

Stay tuned for Jeremy updates - until then...

Love to everyone!

It is about Time

2009-03-29T21:49:00.010-06:00

Would you believe that every night I look at my computer and think I should post about today... But instead say - 'I will do it tomorrow'. Well tomorrow is finally here.

We are all doing great. Sam had a doctors appt last Thursday (the day of the BIG snow here in Denver). She was pretty apprehensive about getting her stitches out but Dr. Heare just said - DO IT! She was happy in the end. Since her stitches are out and the leg is looking fantastic, she was able to get a waterproof cast this time. That made her day - her month even. She went into the jacuzzi for the first time in 2 years. I cleared a path thru the snow. :)

Here you can see a picture of Sam' leg. I may look a bit frightening to some but to us it is absolutely beautiful. The main section there is her muscle flap. It is pink and healthy and the skin is filling in perfectly.

The scars look dramatic here but as a whole her leg looks so much better than before with the infection and uneven healing.

Once we got home, I cleaned up her toes a bit and painted them a perfect color of pink (what else?).

You may have heard we got some snow. I was actually going to post on Thursday night with the title "Dumb Ass". Daniel of course thought, 'what is a little snow - everyone is over reacting!'

Well here is my son looking so 'cool' meeting us at the van which he got stuck in the snow. He wasn't even wearing a coat. Jeremy and I had to dig out the van and bring him home.

Here is a picture of our front walk on Friday morning.

Last weekend Jeremy and Isabella went skiing - so I included a picture - so cute!

Saturday was a pretty fun and busy day as well. We visited the Denver Art Museum as a family. It always amazes me to see all that talent. Then later Samantha wanted to get her hair cut and colored. She chose a natural black color with red undertones. She feel fantastic and of course looks beautiful.

Isabella could not be left out - she used some of the money she earned to buy a pink hairpiece of all things. She wore it for 2 days straight. Jeremy just walked around shaking his head - but he was the one who gave her the money to spend. :)

Today was a great day as well. Jeremy is feeling healthy again - he spent the day skiing. I sent to kids to the movie (Monsters vs. Aliens) and I spent the day cleaning the house and making spaghetti and meatballs. My cousin Kelli and her boyfriend Rich came for a visit. We had a wonderful time - I am just hoping that the house full of kids didn't overwhelm them too much.

I know it will take her some time to get used to Colorado - but I am super happy she is here. She looks beautiful and it was a lot of fun talking with her and Rich.

Spring break is finally over and I for one am super happy. Samantha is going back to school tomorrow - she is a bit nervous but excited as well. Isabella will have an adjustment going back to school but I think she will be happy to see her friends regularly again.

Other than that - we are waiting for the snow to melt and the spring bulbs to bloom. I will try to do better on the updates...

Love to everyone!

We have a ROCKSTAR that Pees in the toilette

2009-03-09T21:11:00.003-06:00

I love being home! I was actually preparing mentally to come home on Tuesday. The usual stay for a big surgery like this is 4 to 5 days. Samantha made it 3. About 1 pm today she decided she would rather be home. Last night was a rough one - not because of pain - but because we had a pump malfunction that beeped continuously and another machine that sounded like a fire alarm every time her oxygen level dipped below a certain point (which was usually wrong).

The night nurse had to take blood and her IV wouldn't draw so they had to poke her again. On top of all that - 7 am (daylight savings time) came so fast - I wasn't prepared. At least Sam got to go back to sleep until 11:30 am or so, but I had to work.

She took her percoset expecting that when she moved it would hurt more - but it turned out that she had too much pain meds and she was feeling a bit dizzy. Once she ate a bit she felt much better. Then the nurse removed her catheter - letting us know that once she peed in the toilette she was cleared to go home.

We were super excited when that happened - hence the blog title...

So we are home now - Isabella is in bed after her bath and book - Sam is relaxing watching a Harry Potter movie - Daniel is hanging with his dad tonight watching a basketball game. Jeremy of course is working so I decided to take this time to update.

We have the next doctor appointment on Thursday where she will get the splint off and a cast on.

Hopefully I will have some pictures (x-rays) of her leg by then as well.

Until then - Love to everyone - especially my Rockstar of a daughter!

A Little Ornery

2009-03-08T22:12:00.003-06:00

You know Sam is feeling good when she is ornery - and she is with a capital O! The surgery on Friday went just as it should and she now has a bone in her leg. Yahoo!

She managed pain fantastically all weekend - today they took the epidural out and she is on oral pain meds. Tomorrow we will see Dr. Heare again (I am going to ask for x-rays) and I assume we will be going home tomorrow evening or Tuesday afternoon.

Sam did her nails today - and is currently (at 10 pm) eating a piece of tandoori chicken while watching some late night TV.

This time around - Sam's choices for boredom busters are the Gossip Girl season one set of DVDs and Harry Potter movies.

It is getting late so I am going to finish quickly tonight - 7 am comes even quicker with this Daylight Savings thing we have going on.

Night and Love to everyone!

Out with a Bang

2009-03-04T20:56:00.002-07:00

I woke up this morning - arrived at the hospital - checked Sam in and we all were feeling so happy. I have had such a good feeling about this lately so we were a bit surprised when Dr. Heare came to talk to us after only 2 hours. It turns out that about 2/3 thru the procedure the cadaver bone split. They were putting the rod thru the inside of bone. Dr. Heare was pretty upset - but things happen. Samantha as you can see from the picture is feeling fine. The epidural is working fantastically!

The 7th floor (oncology) was full so we are not in our usual spot. The nurses so far are really nice and doing a great job.

Tonight's post is going to be kind of short - 4:30 am came quickly - even my hospital is looking comfy. :)

Her next (and hopefully final) surgery is scheduled for Friday at 1 pm, until then we will just hang out and keep her comfortable.
Night!
Love to everyone!

It Has Been Two Years Today

2009-02-21T19:22:00.005-07:00

So as I promised here is Daniel's logo he designed. There is this Tapas restaurant and lounge in Denver and his challenge was to come up with a logo for this company and to present it. Tapas are Spanish appetizers this place is named after a bar made famous by James Michener's novel "The Drifters" in Spain. It was a favorite hangout for poets and artists.

The restaurant here in Denver is known for their Spanish wines and lounge like atmosphere. My favorite version of the logo is the top version because the glass of wine is red as well as the number 9. The musician has the Spanish feel and the glass of wine conveys what the restaurant is famous for. The current logo is 8 purple, red and orange rectangles (http://9thdoor.com/events.html). I am probably biased but I am so proud of Daniel and I think his logo is fantastic.

I tossed and turned last night - uncomfortable - and woke up feeling off. The day flew by as I did all the things I was supposed to do today, but I kept flashing back to the events of this same weekend two years ago. We had just learned that Samantha did in fact have cancer. The fear was indescribable - to this day nothing matches it except the fear that it may return. I have watched my daughter grow up the last 2 years from a girl to a young courageous woman. Even with all the complications and the multiple scars covering her body, she is a one year survivor! Thinking on it - I decided the whole family are survivors. Samantha had the worst of it - but Daniel and Isabella and Jeremy have paid a price as well - I sometimes forget....

I still read the Caring Bridge sites and I still hear of children whose cancer has returned for second and third times. Two of Samantha's friends from her cancer teen group are always in my thoughts - one young man so full of life who always has a smile is battling for his third time and another girl's mother is battling with the decision on how to handle her daughter's last days. Each and every day I am grateful that Samantha is still cancer free.

I know our family is stronger than we were - I hope my 3 children realize it as well as they grow and are able to look back with perspective. I will not lie and say life has been easy these past two years, but we got thru them and we will continue to get thru them. My hope is to make sure my family laughs more than we cry and that the arguments are short - some days are better than others...

Samantha is feeling alright - a bit restless but who can blame her. Daniel teaches me daily the importance of keeping my mouth shut :) and Jeremy is still a bit sore (it has been barely a week) and a bit restless as well. Isabella had a full weekend - friends and parties - oh my!

I was all exited to have a chance to clean the house in a nice and relaxing way; however, between Isabella's social calendar and Daniel's impromptu requests to get some new clothes and a hair cut, nothing was accomplished. As I sit here I am amazed with that even though I barely sat down all weekend.

Oh well, it was still a good weekend. And now that it is over, I will say goodnight and love to everyone!

Getting Better

2009-02-20T19:27:00.017-07:00

Well all patients are on the mend.

Here is a picture of what Jeremy has been doing to keep himself amused - notice the iPhone in his hand...

Samantha and Daniel came back home on Wed - so the activity level has increased. Sam kept herself busy one night taking pictures of herself - she had just washed her hair and it looked good. She wanted to capture it before it turned into bedhead. :)Grandma Liz got Isabella some cool sunglasses - she was posing for me - wonder where she learned to do the looks....

You would think family life would have slowed down a bit - but no. Monday Isabella had to get out of the house (Jeremy was still recovering and I had to work during the day and she was bored). So we spent some time at the park (actually til dark) once work slowed down.

Tuesday we hit the book store - Wed the big kids came home - Thursday, Lindsey brought dinner so Isabella had Leaf to hang with.

Here is quick picture of Dan. He doesn't let me grab them often, but he was in a good mood. After a day on the slopes he got all dressed up to go to Salsa dancing lessons with a friend of his. He is also competing in a Graphic Arts contest and just submitted his artwork and write up today. The challenge was to design a logo for a local business. I will see if I can get a copy of it and post it this weekend. I thought it was really cool. He is so excited - it is a breath of fresh air.

We met with Sam's surgeon yesterday as well. Everything looks good. The portion of her left thigh where they took her skin graft is healing beautifully and she doesn't have too much pain any more. She is a bit bored always sitting and not too motivated to do school work. We have 2 more weeks before the next surgery (scheduled for March 4th) and then 4 weeks more after that before she can get mobile again. The doctor said she probably won't have a cast after this next surgery since she will have a bone and they don't want to cover the flap - we will still have to watch is closely.

Everything is really getting better. Jeremy is a bit grumpy dealing with his restrictions but he got a 'get out of the house' pass for tomorrow.

Roxy got her staples out (we think a bit too early) but she is pretty happy that she doesn't have to wear the cone any more. I joke that is has been a canine pinball game in the house - she bounced of one thing or another constantly.

Isabella has a fun filled weekend coming up - I will take some pictures. I am just excited to have a chance to catch up on cleaning the house. Silly isn't it - but with always heading back and forth to one hospital or another - I only get to do it every other week. Then it takes all weekend. I actually cherish the ability to clean at my own leisure. I mess with my plants and I can follow my train of thought as it wanders off course without stressing. I think it will be a nice day tomorrow so I may even go for a bike ride (he he he). It is time to start thinking about the Courage Classic ride and I am going to do the complete course this year.

It is also time to start planning the gardens - life is good!

Ok - I am off - Love to everyone!

Happy Day of Love

2009-02-14T19:30:00.009-07:00

Valentines day in our home isn't a really big deal - I like to think everyday is a day of love for us. -- lol.

Isabella however, did have a great day yesterday. She filled out her cards and we brought treats for the Valentines Day party at her school. They had so many sweet treats that the kids (including Isabella) were turning them away - what a surprise!

Our friends Phil and Cori brought Jeremy a heart shaped cookie and a bike magazine yesterday - so he got his sweets too!

Here is Isabella in her Valentines day hat! Grandma Liz was telling her that not everyone is a hat person - but she definitely was! Totally Cute!

I took these other pictures when the girls were watching the Grammys on Sunday. Guess who was performing? One guess - the Jonas Brothers - what a surprise. As you can see, Samantha is looking wonderful - even bedridden.

Jeremy is doing well but he decided he wanted to stay one more night - just to make sure his lung isn't leaking. The pump has been turned off all day today and he is still pink! All good.
His Uncle John and cousin Sean came for a visit. Damien was here at the hospital when we arrived this morning. We decided to give him a bit of a rest this afternoon while we took Isabella home and I made him some dinner. I then came back and we had a nice dinner together - kind of a date... :)

I told Jeremy he should update his facebook - post "here a hole, there a hole, everywhere a hole - hole". He has 2 holes in the front of his chest and one in his back where the scopes went in.

He has been up and walking around pretty good so I am sure he will do fine once we get him home - even better when he can get a full nights sleep.

I know I am ready for a good nights sleep as well. When Jeremy doesn't sleep at home - our dog Roxy thinks it is her duty to take his place - I actually has to sleep horizontal in our king size bed because both dogs and the cat took over. I guess I am just too soft - I can't kick them out like Jeremy does.

We got a bit of snow last night - I am glad for the moisture but the warmer days last week make me stir crazy for spring. Spring is my favorite time of year. I should probably start planning my gardens and searching for seeds. I am super excited because I have an outside greenhouse and a bigger veggie garden this year - yahoo! Hopefully we will be able to enjoy more of the summer this year.

Have a great weekend - Love to everyone!

Quick update

2009-02-13T10:17:00.005-07:00

Just a quick update - Jeremy's doctor just came out and said he is doing well. Everything went as expected. He will be in recovering for about an hour and then they will let us go back to see him. After we move up to his room and get him settled - I will give folks a call.

Love to all!

Blebs

2009-02-11T21:31:00.003-07:00

It could be one big bleb or many small ones, kind of like bubble wrap - that is the official medical term for the imperfection on Jeremy's lung. A bleb causes the lung to pop.

Jeremy met with the surgeon and after talking with the doctor we feel certain that the surgery is the best coarse of action. After looking at his x-rays, the surgeon said Jeremy actually had a tension pneumothorax - that is when the lung collapses so much that it starts pushing the heart out of place. This can be very dangerous because the movement of the heart can kink the blood vessels...

The surgeon said if Jeremy had come into his ER, he would have performed the surgery right then. As it stands now, Jeremy's surgery is Friday morning. They will go in and first scope the lung to find the blebs, then they deflate the lung and remove them. They then do a controlled injury to the rib cage and re-inflate it. The lung then heals against the rib cage so in the unlikely event that this happens again, the lung won't collapse. The blebs are usually on the top of the lung and the doctor assured Jeremy that his lung capacity will not be compromised. He will stay in the hospital 2 to 5 days depending on if his lung leaks a bit or not. He won't be able to travel to higher elevations for at least 10 days. He will then be good as new.

Jeremy's mom - Liz - is flying into Denver tomorrow evening. Jeremy is a bit nervous - who can blame him? I will be working from the hospital on Friday and will post as soon as I can after he is in his room. The procedure should only be an hour and a half.

Samantha is doing well - moving around as much as she can. She is staying with her dad this week. Isabella is excited to see her grandma. Jeremy and I are enjoying a few relatively quiet days - trying to get caught up on work.

The weather is cold here - last night it snowed and I think it might again tonight - but it was so beautiful. Big white flakes coming down in the moonlight. My favorite time of the year is coming up - Spring. Hopefully I will have a happy, healthy and mobile family by then!

Take care - Love to everyone!

My Poor Stitched Up Family

2009-02-06T22:30:00.008-07:00

Roxy is Home! Yahoo! She is getting around very slowly - she just looks at me, her eyes saying "help me!" She of course has the big cone on her head. In the picture below - you can see her paw trying to push it off.

The surgery went well and in about 2 weeks she won't have to wear the cone any more and we can start exercising her.

Roxy is home all stitched up and hobbling around and I wanted to show everyone a picture of Sam - all stitched up and laying around. She is not too happy with me here... She has an ice pack in her hand - icing her shot site. She has a small catheter insterted just under her skin where we give her blood thinner shots. They sting pretty bad - but icing helps.

Jeremy went to see the lung specialist on Thursday and they took the tube out of his chest. He is feeling pretty good. We found out that there is a 50% chance of this spontaneous neurothormax (lung popping) happening again with no warning. There is a procedure that changes that to a 95% chance it will never happen again. He is meeting with the surgeon next week to get more information on what they do. So far we are thinking they will scope his lung to find the imperfection and reinforce it for lack of a better medical term. He will be in the hospital for about a week and then another week at home taking it easy and another 4 to 6 weeks doing nothing strenuous and no high elevations or flying.

Jeremy has decided to get this done as soon as possible - before Sam's next surgery. That way our summer plans won't have to change too much. We have traveling to do for his cousins graduation - we have the Courage Classic - Jeremy has mulitple Leadville mountain bike races...

The list is long. We continue to battle for balance. I guess the price we pay to have some quality time later is a bit of craziness now. That is what Sam is doing - Once she is done and walking again - she will be set.

So I think that is it with the family health update... Daniel and I battled a little stomach thing that only lasted 24 hours and we are back to feeling good. Daniel has plans all weekend already. Isabella is booked for the rest of the month if you can believe it. She has a birthday sleepover tonight, another birthday party next weekend, and a birthday party and TeddyBear Tea and concert the following weekend. I talked with her teacher and she did ok this past week when we were in the hospital. She was a bit emotional a couple of days but is back to normal now that we are home.

Jeremy tells me I should just stop talking to people - but I decided to make some friends with the mothers of Isabella's school friends. That way we can do play dates and such. Isabella is a lot like her dad that way - she loves to keep busy and is happiest hanging out with her friends.

Now for something light.... When Samantha was in the hospital this last time - she hated that her hair was so yucky. She never had to worry about that before - lol. Any way the nurses found this shampoo cap. It is pretty cool - you warm it up in the microwave and stick it on her head and massage it for a while. I cleans the hair - we took pictures and I am posting as I promised Amy (Dr. Heare's assistant and Sam's second mom).

Here is Sam - out of her bed for the first time, getting her head massaged.

As you can see, she loved it. It actually worked pretty well - we didn't have to rinse - just towelled her hair dry afterward.

Alrighty - I better get to work . My weekends are precious and I have quite a list already.

As soon as we have the date for Jeremy's surgery I will post it. Samantha and Daniel are heading to their dad's house on Monday. Samantha is super excited to get to spend some time with her new brother! She will also have to start spending some time each day getting caught up on her school work.

Enjoy your weekend! Love to everyone!

Home Sweet Home Again!

2009-02-04T21:26:00.003-07:00

The Gilmore Girls did it - we watched the last episode and Samantha declared she was ready to go. We got home around 5 pm this evening.

Samantha is doing great - did you expect anything less?

Isabella is so cute - I was excited to see her. Even after being gone from home for a week and not seeing her since Sunday - I still took the back seat to her friend Reagan from across the street.

Jeremy still has the chest tube in but he is feeling back to normal which is good. He is meeting with his doctor tomorrow morning - I am assuming the chest tube will come out. He is also hoping to learn if there is anything he can do to prevent this from happening again.

Work was busy today but one more day down until the weekend. I am cutting this short tonight - I get to sleep in my own bed tonight - Yahoo!

love to everyone!

Moving and Grooving

2009-02-03T20:20:00.004-07:00

We are still here at the hospital. Yesterday was a big day for Samantha. Dr. Heare took all the dressing off of her leg and put her in a cast from the knee down. There is an actual hole in the cast so we can see the flap. She needs to watch it carefully when she moves to make sure it doesn't turn from pink to blue. Right now she can only lower her leg for 5 minutes or less.

Today she moved from the bed to the chair and is using the bedside commode. The most painful part of her leg is where they took the skin graph. It is pretty intense looking at her leg all beat up. For some reason this latest surgery is really hard for me to look at - I think seeing all her scars and bandages is visual reminder of what cancer does. She has scars under both breasts from her port and broviac. She has a big brown scar from the front of her pelvis around her hip ending at her butt cheeks. From the last post you can see how big the lower leg scar will be and she will have another long scar on her inner thigh and a 2x6 inch rectangle on the top of her thigh.

She has a small catheter placed under her skin so daily blood thinner shots can be given for the next 4 weeks. This medicine is necessary while she is bed ridden to prevent blood clots in her legs and stings like mad for the 3 minutes after she gets it.

She now knows exactly how tough she is now and she has the battle scars to prove it.

I talked with Jeremy today as well. He saw a doctor yesterday and his lung looked good so they capped him off but he was having trouble breathing and took it off for the night. This morning he capped it off again and has made it all day feeling good. He has an appointment with a specialist on Thursday and they will probably remove the tube then. He will also learn what needs to be done to make sure this doesn't happen again.

All Samantha has to do is feel comfortable using her crutches to get back and forth from the bathroom and we can leave. We only have 1 more episode of Gilmore Girls so I am thinking she may be ready to leave tomorrow.

Daniel took Isabella swimming tonight - if you have facebook - look for Jeremy and you can see the picture. When I am home I will grab it and post hit here...

I know it is only Tuesday but I am ready for the weekend already. Work is busy and as much as I think I will get done here at the hospital - the distractions are many so as usual - I am behind.

I haven't been able to see Isabella, Daniel and Jeremy since Sunday and I am missing all of them bunches! I bet you get tired of hearing that... :)

I'm sorry I didn't post any pictures tonight - I have been trying to convince Samantha that she should let me take a few to show everyone had great she looks - but you know 15 year old girls - no make up no picture.

I am pretty tired tonight so I am going to hit the sack.

Love to everyone!

One of Those Days

2009-02-01T18:57:00.011-07:00

Pictures of Jeremy and Isabella today - Isabella is still in her jammies holding a someone else's glass and of course not looking at me as usual.

Every once in a while I have these days when I wish... The kind of wish where you get angry when you realize it isn't going to come true.

Sometimes they are big wishes - like Sam would never have had cancer or since she did that her surgery would have worked out the first time.

Sometimes I wish I would win the lottery and sometimes I just wish that I wouldn't have to chose between work and family at times.

Today I wished that I didn't have to chose between Jeremy and Isabella and Samantha...
I felt sorry for myself on the ride back to the hospital but by the time I got to Sam's room, I was back into my mom mode and not wasting time or energy wishing - just accepting the way it is right now.

Sam gave me the green light to go visit J and Izi for a couple of hours. Isabella must have missed me a little bit because she let me just hold her longer than just a sec - that hardly ever happens.

Jeremy and Isabella are over at a friends - Isabella is playing and Jeremy was helping Seth put together some sushi rolls for dinner. My visit with them was nice - I just sat back and watched them both. Jeremy's color is still good but he went in for an x-ray today and his lung still isn't completely inflated. He will need a couple more days to get back to normal. It is hard for him to just relax but he knows what he has to do.

Samantha is having a better day today. She is on oral pain meds now and soon will be able to get rid of her IV. She still has to lay flat but Dr. Heare said that tomorrow he will put her leg in a cast so she will be able to move easier. He told us the cast will have a window so we can watch the flap to make sure it stays healthy. She will be bedridden for the next 4 weeks, able to get up to go to the bathroom only. She has 2 more weeks of antibiotics and we are expecting the next surgery to be mid March. I thought we would be going home Monday or Tuesday but now they are saying Wednesday or Thursday. The doctors want to make sure Sam can move easily and learns her limits before leaving for home.

Right now we are watching the Superbowl, waiting for the cool commercials. I finally set up a facebook profile. Tommy with Samantha's cancer teen group went on and on about it and my friend Lindsey also told me I should - so I bit the bullet and did it. Now I just have to sit back and see if I can connect with any friends...

Samantha has promised to add me - so I will have at least one. :)

I guess I will end with a picture of Samantha's leg - the doctors are very proud - but a warning it is a bit graphic ...

The grid that you see is the skin graph and will eventually fill in - when everything is healed up it will look similar to a burn scar.

It will look a lot better than the earlier scars.

I hope I didn't freak anyone out - but I thought it was interesting.

I want to end by wishing my Grandma a happy birthday and I will try to call tomorrow.

Love to everyone!

What Lack of Sleep Can Will Do For You

2009-01-31T21:18:00.003-07:00

Emotions go up and come down...

Last night was a rough night for Samantha. The nurses had to move her a lot and they were having trouble getting the pulses (equipment issues) - we were lucky to get 15 minutes of sleep at a time.

Then this morning around 8 am they turned off the epidural and started oral pain meds. Because of all the movement during the night, Sam used her pain button quite a bit. The pain doctors recommended a little bit of Valium to help keep her relaxed. It worked a bit too well.

This afternoon I tried to go home and check on Jeremy and I was going to pick up Isabella and bring her to the hospital with me. Just when I got home Chris called and said that Sam needed me back as soon as possible. Sam woke up disoriented and wouldn't let anyone touch her. So I jumped into the van and headed back to the hospital. Isabella went cross country skiing with the Waltons today and didn't get back in time for me to bring her with me. Jeremy assured me he was feeling well enough to take care of Izi.

I got back and Samantha calmed down a bit. She is feeling better, ate some dinner and guess what we are watching? Gilmore Girls - what a surprise!

It can be a bit hard when I really want to be in 2 places at once. Isabella was gone when I got home last night so I have not seen her in a couple of days and that is hard too. I know she is fine and had a blast hanging out with her friend Leah - but I am selfish. :)

Some really good news about one our our friends from here at the hospital - Taylor (her caring bridge site in over on the left) had her scans yesterday. Her tumors are shrinking!!! It brought tears to my eyes. Being back at the hospital and seeing the kids brings back memories and good news is always welcome.

I am going to finish tonight with a the news that Samantha is a star... There is a local radio station that does a radiothon every year to raise money for The Children's Hospital. They came to Samantha's teen cancer group to interview the kids and volunteers and put together a video that they have on their website. Here is the link: http://www.alice1059.com/pages/3743639.php. Take a look - Sam is so beautiful!

Night - Love to everyone!

Carl Got a Flat

2009-01-30T22:25:00.003-07:00

Good news first - Samantha is doing well. They moved us up to the 7th floor out of ICU. She ate a bit tonight and was awake a bit more this evening.

Her right arm is a bit swollen from an earlier IV and compounded by the fact that there is still a clot in the artery the broviac was in. The doctors say the body will deal with it and that swelling should go down in a few days. They considered giving her blood thinners but that may hinder the free flap. For right now she is getting aspirin - then tomorrow they are planning on turning off the epidural and getting her on oral meds. Once she is managing her pain that way then they want to get rid of all the IVs and give her veins a break.

I am thinking we will go home on Monday or Tuesday...

Now of course things would not be the same in our household without a little bit of drama. Jeremy (aka Carl) called me this morning and from the tone of his voice I knew something was wrong. At first I thought it was Roxy - she was scheduled to have her surgery today. But no - Jeremy was calling me from the hospital. His lung collapsed again - it happened about 6 or 7 years ago. I forget the medical name for it - but last time we were told that it is common among young athletic men. It is even more common to happen multiple times. It so happened that last evening he was feeling out of sorts and having trouble sleeping. At about 3:30 am or so he knew it was the lung and called Damian. Isabella woke up and was a great helper getting dad to the hospital and also at the hospital. She was a mim nurses assistant. Jeremy is doing alright now - they put a tube into his lung thru his chest to help keep the pressure where it needs to be so the lung will stay inflated until the tear heals. Last time he needed to be in the hospital 4 days but this time they sent him home - the technology has improved leaps and bounds according to his doctor. He is on pain meds and is to rest until Sunday when he will go back in and they will cap off the tube and wait another day to make sure the lung doesn't collapse again. If it is good - then on Monday they will remove the tube.

Isabella is at a friends house for the night. I took off a couple hours from the hospital while Chris sat with Sam and went home to make sure he was alright for myself. His color is good, he is just moving a bit slowly.

I made him promise to call 911 if he had any problems during the night and to call me when he woke up tomorrow morning so I know he is ok. I hate that he is home alone - but he wouldn't come and stay with me in the hospital.

I always feel like we are just normal people - is there another normal family out there that has such an active life? If so - please let me know we are not alone!! :)

I got to talk with my friend Dianna today so I am feeling better about things all around. However, I am more sure than ever that I want to take a vacation - just a small one. What do you say Rena - maybe we should run away for a weekend to someplace warm and sunny - say.... California? Maybe a bed and breakfast in wine country?

I will start dreaming about it now....

I will update again tomorrow and let everyone know how Sam did coming off the epidural and how Jeremy is doing with his chest tube.

Until then - Love to everyone!!

Pink and Pulsing

2009-01-29T20:36:00.008-07:00

Catch your attention? Pink and Pulsing describes the surgery site and this is good. So yesterday we were meeting with the doctors at around 5:30 am, getting a chance to ask questions about what would happen. Samantha hesitated a bit but then let her question loose. For the past month we have been talking about doing this 'free flap' down around her ankle. She was concerned that flap meant the skin would actually be flapping around...

We all had a good laugh and it reminded us how kids hear and understand things. Dr. Heare explained that it was called a flap because originally they would cut part of a muscle and flap it over to repair a damaged area. Hers is called a 'free flap' because now they can actually cut the muscle out completely and put it anywhere it is needed. He explained that this flap would be completely attached down by her ankle. Dr. Ozer took the muscle from the inside of her left thigh, then he attached all the important blood vessels to the muscle and covered it all with a skin graft.

Originally we were told that this surgery would be about 5 hours, but all in all it ran about 8. A very long day but also very successful. During the original limb salvage surgery she lost the posterior artery (the one that runs down behind and to the inside of the leg) because it ran right thru the original tumor. But the body is amazing and it started to re-grow and branch out. It was not at big as the other artery (the one that runs on top of the leg) but it was big enough to support the flap. This in itself was great news. It improves the success rate of the operation dramatically.

After the surgery Samantha was taken into intensive care. The reason for this is that the flap needs to be monitored very carefully for 72 hours. The first 24 hours are the most important. She has this huge dressing on her leg - from hip to toe. But they cut a tunnel down to the flap - if you look down you see this pink tender skin with a kind of mesh on top. Then the nurses have an ultrasound machine they lower onto the exposed site to listen for the pulsing of the blood. Both the pink and the pulsing are very important. Everything they are doing now is to encourage good blood flow all the way down to her toes. She is on an epidural because that medicine tends to enlarge the arteries, her foot has what they call a bear hug blanket - blowing warm air constantly on the leg. They also are really trying to keep Samantha's pain level low, because when you are in pain the arteries constrict. For the most part - Samantha has been sleeping. I think this is a good thing - she is relaxed and comfortable.

We made it thru the first 24 hours so the chance of survival (of the flap) jumped higher. All the doctors will relax a bit once we hit the 72 hour mark. I am thinking we will probably be in the hospital about a week - it all really depends on Sam and her flap... That sounded kind of funny.

We have had a couple of our favorite nurses stop by to check on her - all asking when she will get to move to the 7th floor. I also noticed a girl from Sam's cancer teen group here in intensive care. I believe she had a stroke and is battling an infection - this was a side effect of the chemo she is on... I see her mom - both Daniel and Samantha know her. I hope that she comes thru this - it has been a really long battle for her.

Let's see - Daniel is doing ok - his attitude has taken a turn towards the mellow, maybe it is because we are taking a time out from each other - lol. Isabella received a gold sticker today for completing her 'teen' level of math beads. She is very proud of herself! She was a bit upset tonight because she could not come back to see Samantha and she misses her. So we ended up getting a gift (A teen magazine with the Jonas Brothers on the front) to give to Sam and some 'not hot' Cheetos for her. She left happy as a clam.

Tomorrow our dog Roxy is going into surgery too - she tore her ACL and after searching long and hard we found a clinic that will repair it for a reasonable price. We are all super excited for this because the alternative would have been to put her down. She is in too much pain.

As I nurse Sam back to feeling good here in the hospital - Jeremy will be nursing Roxy back to health at home. Never a dull moment in the Layer house...

I know that after this surgery, I will feel a bit better. With each successful procedure we are closer to getting Sam walking again and all this will be worth it.

Take care - send good vibes -

Love to everyone!!

PS - ending with a picture of Sam all dolled up this past Sunday.

Long Week - Long Day

2009-01-27T21:12:00.003-07:00

I don't think it was a full moon. Maybe I am wrong - I should probably check. This week has been long and hard and it is only Tuesday - jeez.

The weekend was nice for the most part - kind of short but we got to go visit some friends on Sunday. Monday hit us full force - work has been super busy and Samantha has not been feeling well. Daniel, I think is feeling off too.

I definitely know I am off. I am not on the same wave length as the kids lately - turning into one of those crazy moms that most teenagers talk about. I was hoping to handle it a bit better once we got to this point. My goal now is to thicken up my skin and relax a bit.

Samantha was having some issues with her broviac - we can not draw blood lately. The last time she received her antibiotic it burned a bit so the doctor had us come in and get an x-ray to check out the line. It seems that the broviac may be leaking a bit so the doctor will fix that during tomorrows surgery.

The good news is that since we were all ready at the hospital and getting x-rays they decided to do her chest CT scan and pelvic x-rays - both of which looked fantastic. These are the scans they were planning to do during next weeks Oncology 3 month check up. SAMANTHA IS NOW 1 YEAR CANCER FREE!!!!!! YAHOO!!!!!

Tomorrow will be a long day as well - but we will be one step closer to Samantha walking again.

In the meantime I will continue to wade thru the turmoil of teenage drama and pull all the humor out of the situations I can. If anyone has some good tips - please pass them along.

Night and love to everyone!

It's Been Too Long

2009-01-23T21:56:00.006-07:00

Let's see - it has been 3 weeks since my last update - what has happened since then?

Well Jeremy rode a mechanical bull. We had an opportunity to see Robert Earl Keen at this country bar and as Jeremy was returning from the restroom, he eyed THE BULL. He was determined to try it out. I tried to capture his heroic ride on my camera phone, but all I got was this blur. The bull was going so fast it was hard. I think he may have made the 8 seconds but it is hard to tell - influenced as we were by the whiskey. :)

One of our weekends, we were invited up to Winter Park ski resort with some friends. The big kids were hanging with their dad so Jeremy and I decided - what the heck...

We had a really nice visit with our friends and then Sunday morning we were able to do some snow shoeing. Obviously Isabella can't snow shoe yet so she got to ride in a sled.

I really enjoyed getting out in the snow and fresh air. I have not been able to do anything like this in a while. I wish we could do it more often. Isabella laughed as dad tried to keep up on the downhills. She is an ace at balancing inside the sled. She really loved being outdoors as well - never complained about the cold once.

Other than those 2 weekends - life has been pretty normal. The kids are doing well in school and Samantha has been the super girl we have been used to seeing.

Last week we met with the doctor that will be doing the 'skin envelope' to repair the skin around Samantha's ankle that has been damaged by the infection. The doctor was confident and definitely knows what he is doing - which made me feel good. Samantha of course was in rare form when she met him. After a 2 hour wait to see him, he informed her that he wanted to remove her cast to look at the leg. Samantha hates to have the cast removed and it is especially hard on her when she is not prepared for it. She grilled the doctor for almost 20 minutes before he was allowed to remove it - she wanted to know exactly what he would be doing and why.

Basically, in order for this skin repair to work the doctor needs to find a good artery to redirect into the transplanted skin. Most people have 2 main arteries bringing blood to the foot. Samantha lost one of those because it was interlaced with her tumor. We know the other one is strong because her toes are nice and warm and pink.

Ideally it would be wonderful if the other artery ended close enough to her calf to use. Sam had to do a vascular study in order to determine if there is a good vein for the doctor.

We originally scheduled that for Wed. We arrived at The Children's Hospital thinking that Samantha would have to have a quick injection and a special x-ray. However, as we were walking back to the procedure room they started describing the procedure. It turns out that they sedate her and give her some pain meds then cut into an artery near her groin. They thread a catheter down the main artery into her left leg using a camera. Then they inject dye into the blood stream and take a fancy x-ray. This allows them to see all the blood vessels in her leg. After they finish up she has to lie completely flat for 4 hours so the artery can scab over.

We really were not prepared for it and again Samantha was very upset - she hates surprises. We got her all prepped for the procedure and at the last minute she cancelled it. We ended up rescheduling it for today. It worked out much better. Wed evening we had planned on celebrating Daniel's birthday with the uncles and we would have missed that, plus Samantha actually need to stay bedridden for 24 hours after so she would have missed a day of school and 2 important tests.

Samantha showed up today for the procedure all happy and compliant. We have to wait until the doctors see the study to get any result. Although from looking at it today, I didn't see another artery that was very big. I guess we will have to wait and see.

This past weekend was really exciting for the kids. Daniel and Samantha's dad and step mom had their baby - 2 weeks early and on Daniel's birthday. At first Daniel was a bit upset but after he saw the baby he is now pretty happy it worked out this way. It is a good connection between the brothers. Samantha is of course so excited and very helpful. The baby is so adorable - I am really happy for them.

Next week will be pretty busy, her surgery is scheduled for Wed morning and it will take most of the day. We have been told she will be in intensive care for a few days because they need to check her pulses in the foot every four hours.

This weekend - Isabella has a birthday party - we have an invite from some friends - the wash and house need to be taken care of since I will be gone for a while with Samantha.

She has to stay flat for most of tomorrow and I think Jeremy and I may try to catch a movie - we will see.

Work has been super busy for me - I should probably work a bit over the weekend but I am not really good at actually sitting down and doing that. The result will mean I will still be behind at work next week - a never ending story. :)

I know I always promise this - but I will try to update more often and include more pictures - until then - take care!

Love to everyone!

So It Starts Again

2009-01-04T21:11:00.007-07:00

WHEW... We made it thru the holidays - relaxed, happy and ready for the new year - can you believe it?

I think I told everyone last time that Isabella and Jeremy went skiing. So I have added the pictures and the quick video.

The video is short, but keep in mind that my superstar husband is trying to catch her while he is skiing backwards.

Make sure the sound is up when you watch it - Isabella giggles and it is so cute!

So they went skiing on Friday - Sunday we took off for Gunnison to visit our friends Bill and Susan.

Susan just had (2 months ago) another baby boy. She has her hands full now.

I love to visit Gunnison - we always have a relaxing time. Jeremy and Bill went skiing on Monday, while Isabella and I hung out and played with Burke and Bing (their boys).

Isabella had a fantastic time and cried when we had to leave. I think she really enjoys being a 'big sister' type friend.

Burke just followed her around with a big smile on his face.

I got to help with the baby which I just loved! A nice side note - usually I look at babies and try to figure out if and how we can have another one. But this time, I got to enjoy helping out and knowing that we would be leaving without a baby. I think I am at a stage now where I can enjoy all the kids as they are and glad that I won't have another 'terrible two' or 'crazy brained teenager' to look forward to after my three.

We left Gunnison on Tuesday afternoon and stopped for a quick overnight at Mt. Princeton Hot Springs half way home to Denver.

The room was reasonable and we really had a great time soaking in the hot springs that evening and Wed morning. What a view - huh?

There is a part of the property where you can go sit in little side pools of the river. The water is jacuzzi like but the scenery is fantastic. The moon was beautiful ...

For New Year's Eve - we headed to a friends house for dinner and drinks. You know you are getting old when 5 minutes after midnight - you are ready to head home and hit the sack! :) It was super fun and we were glad to be sleeping in our own bed after travelling.

New years day we just relaxed. Both Jeremy and I had a chance to finish our books and start new ones. I actually finished 2 books last year! How great is that? Books are such a luxury in our house.

The big kids came home Thursday evening and we played a bit of Wii. Jeremy and I decided to cut back on Christmas this year and get the family the Wii. Along with the sports games we also got Wii Fit and I personally just love it! Samantha loves to play tennis and she can kick every one's butt regularly now. Daniel and Jeremy go back and forth breaking the ski and snowboarding records. Isabella and I just hang out and take our turns trying to improve our balance with the cool balance games on Wii fit.

I was a bit apprehensive thinking we should be saving more just in case something happens with our jobs, but when I watch Daniel and Samantha laugh together (when they are usually yelling) I know I made the right choice. I also love the fact that Sam can go all day without additional pain meds when she is distracted. We have been watching less TV and moving more - all good.

Sorry for the commercial - jeez...

Then on Friday, Samantha and Isabella did the whole facial treatment. Dan snowboarded on Friday and Jeremy skied on Saturday.

Sunday - today - I spent doing my chores. Sam is still doing some finishing touches to her room which I will post pictures once it is finally finished, and Daniel hung out with his latest girlfriend.

Jeremy is trying to get hyped up for going back to work tomorrow and spent the whole day forcing himself to relax. Anyone who knows Jeremy will understand what a hard thing that is for him to do. I think by 2pm (after a massage, finishing his latest book and working on another shelving project) he announced that he was bored. If the weather was better, I would have had him setting up the greenhouse mom brought for me. He would have complained but at least he would have been busy.

Tomorrow we head back to our hectic lives. All the kids head back to school. Sam is still doing the antibiotic every 6 hours. Her noon dose will get pushed back a bit - but she has the last 2 periods free so I will bring her home early while she still needs the medicine.

Wednesday she wants to go get her driving permit so she can practice driving. I am trying really hard to not think too much about her out there driving. So far she is doing ok in parking lots and close to home (not in real traffic yet.)

I hope everyone out there had a great holiday season like we did. Here is to leaving behind the hard times of the past year and enjoying all that life throws our way this next one!

Love to everyone!

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!

2008-12-25T19:07:00.009-07:00

What a wonderful and relaxing day! A perfect present after a month of crazy activities.

Samantha is doing fantastic. Monday came and we met with Dr. Heare so the dressing could be changed. Samantha once again lived up to her nickname of 'Super Sam'!

She watched the whole thing - as the doctor removed the heavy dressing and checked the incision. She didn't complain at all as they put the new cast on... Dr Heare had to hold onto her big toe and under her knee while they worked. Remember she doesn't have a bone in her lower leg right now. Anyone who has watched the second Harry Potter movie where the bones of his arm were removed will be able to imagine how her leg looked - totally weird. At one point the doctor lowered her leg to let her rest and her ankle and leg flopped a bit. I definitely could have done without seeing that ! Anyway we made it thru that appointment and hurried home to meet Grandma Tina and George.

Tuesday we did some running around later in the afternoon. Mom got to experience our mall during Christmas time. I tell you I often wish that there was a little wine bar attached for times just like this... I remember the mall in Billings Montana (where I grew up) had one and it was so fun to stop there to relax after a day of Christmas shopping. Needless to say we made it home in time to just relax the evening away.

Then on Wed morning we got everyone up and took them into work for the Avaya family Christmas party. It is always nice - the kids get to see a magic show, do crafts, color and eat muffins and doughnuts after they see Santa. Jeremy volunteers as the elf. While most parents complained that they couldn't get their teenagers out of bed to stop by - I just smiled because I didn't have that problem. Daniel and Samantha didn't want to miss the opportunity to see Jeremy done up as the elf. After meeting with Santa we had a great lunch out and headed home to prepare for Christmas Eve.

We like to have our family and friends over then and prepare a big seafood dinner. As usual it was super fun. The kids ran around crazy (the younger ones) watching for Santa while the grownups enjoys some wine and whiskey. Everyone got their fill and then we exchanged presents with those who had to leave. I got to bed around 1 am.

Christmas morning was perfect - while Daniel stressed heavily the night before that I should NOT wake him up under any condition - he was actually the first kid up! Jeremy was up and made breakfast and coffee and cleaned the kitchen when we finally decided that we should probably wake Isabella up so we could get started.

All in all I believe everyone enjoyed their gifts. Every time Isabella met Santa she asked for the High School Musical dolls and Santa remembered! Sam got items to decorate her room PBTeen style and Daniel finally got his own laptop. (this was as much a gift for me as him - now I don't have to listen to the kids fight over the computer and complain how slow it is)

The big kids headed over to their dad's for the next round while everyone here continue to relax and watch movies. Mom and George have to return home tomorrow but it was wonderful having them here to celebrate our craziness.

I am going to finish off with a pictures of Isabella playing with her makeup (thank you Grandma Liz) and dressed as a cheer leader (thank you Heath and family!)

PEACE AND LOVE to everyone!

Freaky Friday

2008-12-19T22:24:00.006-07:00

So we got off to a rough start this morning. I was proud of myself because I felt like freaking out on the home nursing company, but I kept my cool - complained to the management and all turned out ok.

The plan was to have Samantha get her first home antibiotic treatment last night. We were told that the nurse would be at our home at 8 pm then they said between 9 and 10. At 10:30pm last night, I called. Apparently no nurse was scheduled - a miss communication between the hospital and nursing company. No problem there - I thought I could just administer the first dose. But here is the kicker... Samantha has not had this particular antibiotic before, so it is a good idea to have an epi-pen available in case she has a reaction. After talking with doctors we decided that Sam could wait until 8 am this morning for her first dose.

I woke up early and guess what - 8 am came and went. The nursing company tried to cancel again - I of course got a bit upset and we finally got a nurse with an epi-pen out at 10:30 am. Dr. Heare wasn't too concerned so I feel ok now. But I tell you what - my imagination was flying this morning.

Samantha had another pretty good day. She ate well and can't really do much yet - but when she does move she does it pretty well.

I took some pictures so you can see how big the dressing is and how beautiful she is a mere 4 days after a major operation.

Isabella was actually excited about going to school - it was pajama day. Bedtime this evening went super smooth.

We finished the day with a movie - I say 'we' but it was really just me. Samantha was doing something on the computer and Jeremy fell asleep on the couch.

Samantha needs to get her antibiotic 4 times a day - her evening dose is at 10:30 pm and I need to stay up until it finishes - so say at least another hour. Then I will need to get up at 4:30am for the next one. I am regressing back to the baby schedule days. :)

Good thing tomorrow is Saturday and I can just work on the house and Christmas stuff a bit at a time.

Another side effect of waiting for the antibiotic is that I was finally able to upload Isabella's Winter Program performances to You Tube. Here are the links:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OQRtQI1XKRE - This is Isabella singing 'A Partridge in a Pear Tree'

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FBbLeHcTXcQ - This is her Country Christmas Dance

A couple tips for You tube - when you click on the link it will bring up a screen, on the bottom right - just under the volume control, is an option to 'watch in high quality'. It helps. I wasn't the best photographer - I was trying to watch with my own eyes instead of thru the camera and we were back a bit. Also on the left is 'More from Layergal' - you can click on this and see all the videos I have posted without having to come back to this page for the other link.

Thanks to everyone who has posted encouraging words for Sam and the family. It was a tough week but we got thru it just fine and we will handle the next challenge just as well I am sure with the help of every one's thoughts and prayers.

Night and Love to everyone!

Home Sweet Home

2008-12-18T21:55:00.003-07:00

Well we made it home today. It was snowing and cold but home is so nice...

Samantha chose to come home today. She is feeling good and managing her pain great.
The doctors have arranged for a nurse to come to the house and show us how to care for her broviac and administer the antibiotics. We are waiting for the nurse now.

Samantha is taking a quick shower, Isabella is sleeping after we giggled a bit and read a couple of books. I missed putting her to bed!

Daniel is at his dad's tonight, relieved that finals are over and looking forward to a nice break.

Jeremy and I are both looking forward to some quiet times at work (knock on wood!)

It was so familiar leaving the hospital today, but I realized on the way home that we don't have to go back for another 4 weeks - just enough time to start to feel normal again. I felt at home at the hospital but there were so many new faces - a lot of younger kids this time - but the parents all look the same.

It is time to get back into the Christmas spirit, I plan on listening to some of my favorite music and start wrapping packages. I think I am pretty much done - but some will get their gifts late (some things never change). :)

Tomorrow I will probably have to do some grocery shopping and a quick one two on the house.

I will take some pictures tomorrow and post them tomorrow evening - Samantha is looking fantastic, just a big splint on her lower left leg.

Take care!
Love to everyone!

My Daughter Super Sam

2008-12-17T21:17:00.002-07:00

Today will be another quick update. Samantha had a pretty good night - she woke up a couple of times but the nurses are great - not stingy with pain meds at all. I think we have a great combo of meds. There is this one - a liquid form of ibuprofen. It is fantastic for bone pain and swelling. Unfortunately, she can only take it 48 hours at a time.

PT came bright and early and Samantha decided to try and move. She wasn't really happy about it but she did it. She got up and sat in the chair with her leg lowered a bit for quite a while. She tried to use the crutches - but she her right breast area is still tender from the broviac placement. Her leg is also pretty heavily bandaged and awkward. With her weak hip it wasn't realistic that she would be able to crutch down the hall. So the bottom line is that PT agreed that she is doing well enough to go home when she is ready. Dr Heare agreed - if she decides she wants to - we will go home tomorrow.

In the meantime, we continue to watch Gilmore Girls during every waking minute and try to find something that Sam will eat. Good Times... :)

I hope everyone is happy and healthy!
Love to everyone!

Day 2 - Quick update

2008-12-16T21:39:00.004-07:00

So today was ok. Samantha had a pretty good night after giving me the low down on all her friends and the characters of the show "The Hills". There was a lot of turning her and watching her blood pressure.

Dr. Heare wanted the epidural out today so she was transitioned to oral pain meds. This afternoon they removed it for good and she seems to be managing the pain ok. Even though the Dr and physical therapist really wanted her to stand or at least sit on the side of the bed, she would not do it.

I think it is a bit harder for her because she has been here before and knows that it is going to hurt when she finally does move that leg. She is resisting. Tomorrow she won't have a choice and I have a feeling it will be a hard day. Then I am thinking we will be able to go home on Thursday.

Isabella is doing ok - a bit of a rough start this morning but she had a blast playing in the hospital playroom this evening. She remembers this routine as well. She just wanted to make sure Samantha and I would be home before Christmas.

Daniel was actually nice to his sister today - played some x-box video game with her for a while. He had part of his Calculus midterm today and he finishes up the rest of his tests on Thursday.

The weather is still cold but at least the sun came out today so the roads are improving.

I think that is it for now - sorry for the short report tonight - but I am beat.

Until tomorrow - Love to everyone!

It's About Time

2008-12-15T21:09:00.005-07:00

I am so sorry about not updating for so long. Life has been busy and long story short, Samantha's infection in her ankle was getting bad and so we decided to move up the surgery. It was today.

During the time between Thanksgiving and now we have been meeting with doctors and preparing for this day. Thanksgiving was nice and relaxing - my very favorite holiday! Food, good wine and most important - friends and family.

Samantha has been working at keeping caught up at school and even took a couple of her midterm tests early. She has been doing wonderful at school!

After careful consideration she decided to try and save her ankle. If you remember - she had to chose between a below the knee amputation or 3 to 5 surgeries and another year of healing. No one should have had to make this decision - but my bright beautiful daughter took on the challenge and did what she felt was right. She woke up this morning happy she made the decision and now that she is resting comfortably this evening - I am happy.

We packed our hospital bags this morning and listened to Sam's favorite music (super loud) on the drive to the hospital. We checked into the hospital and fell right back into the old routine. It is kind of scary how easy it was - even though it has been 9 months since we have been back for an overnight visit, it is very familiar.

As I waited for Samantha's surgery to finish, I was thinking that last time this year we were here for one of Samantha's hardest times. I remember being upset because I wasn't able to do Christmas shopping, I remember the small Christmas tree set up in the corner. I remember Samantha's swollen lips and all the pumps pushing food and medicine. That stay was 10 days - and we can be glad that this visit should only last 4 days.

At least this time I was prepared. I am almost done with Christmas shopping - we visited Santa yesterday (as you can see by the picture) and the kids baked 'grandma's cookies' yesterday. Perfect timing, since they help settle Sam's stomach after being under this afternoon.

Samantha received an epidural to help manage pain - I am grateful for that. We have to watch - move her around a bit and monitor her blood pressure, but she is comfortable so for that I am happy.

Today's surgery was to remove all the hardware and the cadaver bone, put in an antibiotic coated rod as a place holder and a broviac for her antibiotic treatment over the next 4 to 6 weeks.

The next surgery will be in 2 to 4 weeks. Dr. Heare and a plastic surgeon will try to repair the muscle and tissue around her left ankle. To do that, they move a muscle from her back to her ankle. They hook up the veins and arteries - this will help get good blood supply down to her toes and allow Dr. Heare to close the wound better once the new cadaver/rod is placed in her leg. She will also have to have a skin graph. It seems like a long hard process and it is - but Samantha knows and is ready for the challenge. At any time during the next few months, if she decides that it is too much - she can opt for the amputation or if it looks like the infection won't go away... But for now, we are all just hoping for the best. So far it is good and Dr. Heare says we have a 60 to 70 percent chance of success. As always - we will take it a day at a time.

Daniel is doing well. His favorite class is graphic arts - he is really good at it - his teacher is pushing him since she sees his talent. He is preparing for his midterm tests and will take them this week. I think he is pretty excited for Christmas and the break.

Isabella has been on a Santa 'high' the past couple of weeks. She loved decorating for Christmas and was super excited to see Santa. She had a upsetting dream the other night - she woke up and was pretty upset because in her dream, she wasn't on Santa's 'good' list and only got a rock in her stocking. I forgot how nice it was when the kids are this age and they work extra hard at being nice... But I think her favorite is the advent calendar and she hasn't forgot to get her candy once all month! :)

She also had her winter program at school last week. I took some video and will try and get it uploaded to You-Tube soon.

Let's see - I probably am missing a whole bunch of info from the last few weeks - but it has been a long day. I promise to update more often and let everyone know how we are doing.

Until tomorrow - take care - stay warm - and lots of love to everyone!

PINK is everywhere!

2008-11-16T20:04:00.010-07:00

Where do I begin? We woke up this morning to absolutely beautiful weather. Jeremy took off for a quick mountain bike ride, while Isabella and I loaded up the chariot and headed out on my bike. We rode up to the coffee shop, had some breakfast and coffee (of course) then stopped at the park on the way home. It was so beautiful and the wind had not kicked up yet.

The rest of the day we spent doing chores. Jeremy finished some shelves for Isabella's room which just had to be pink! They turned out beautiful and we loaded them up with her books. We cleaned and organized her toys, now her room looks comfy! Originally we decorated with frogs, fish and flowers, but slowly it is turning into a 'princess' room. First Isabella found a princess light switch plate, then the pink shelves and now she is going to ask Santa for a Princess light.

Last Saturday we went out to celebrate Samantha's birthday with the uncles and Donna - Sam's friend. It was a wonderful dinner - but we probably won't be going back soon - it was gourmet so that meant really good food but really tiny portions and big prices. :)

Then on Sunday (Sam's actual birthday - Sam had a couple of friends over and we had dinner and birthday cake.

This past week the big kids were with their dad. Normally it would be a bit quiet but Samantha was not feeling well so she stayed with us until Thursday night. I took her see Dr. Miller and it looks like she just had the normal crud that is going around. Nothing special ... We laughed about it. When Samantha found out that she didn't even have strep - she said, "nothing special or amazing? I don't know if I know how to handle that."

The infection in her ankle is looking a bit worse so we decided to see if Sam could have the surgery sooner than later. As of now it will be the week of December 15th. I don't know the exact day or time yet. She is happy and sad - she knows that she will feel better but she is still a bit angry that she has to do anything. She felt a bit overwhelmed last week and had a little breakdown. After things settled down, she said how she hates having the emotional outbursts. I just laughed and said - get used to it - with or without cancer/amputation, you are still a girl and that just is part of the package.

We finished up painting her room on Tuesday. Jeremy put her TV back up and moved some shelves. Once Samantha has it all put back together I will take a picture and show everyone - needless to say it is pink as well.

In between painting Sam's room and getting the shelves up in Isabella's room - we managed to get Isabella a haircut (short like Snow Whites was her request) and I had my eyes checked (I am getting old) and I also got a haircut. I did what Samantha recommended - she likes it but Daniel does not. I am still making up my mind. The haircut would make me look a bit younger if my eyes didn't have the dark circles and eczema around them. It actually made me decide that I need to start focusing on myself a bit more. I now have to fix my hair, I can't just put it in a pony and head out. I also need to drink a lot more water. My eye doctor commented on that as well as the lady who took my blood the other day. So I am trying to drink more water and less coffee.

The reason I had my blood taken was to check my thyroid levels again. It turns out that I am way out of whack again. The doctor was surprised that I felt as good as I did. She increased the amount of medicine I take and after a week - when most people start feeling good and loosing weight - I gained 5 pounds - figures! That combined with my haircut has motivated me to start focusing on eating better and exercising more. I found a website - livestrong.com - that is a lot like weight watchers just free! You can keep track of what you eat and how many calories as well as how much you exercise. I think I will try that for a while - we will see how long I can go...

The wonderful weather helps - I can get out and ride my bike. It is a 2 for 1 - I get some exercise and stress relief. :)

Until nextime -
Night and Love to everyone!

2008-11-07T19:13:00.003-07:00

So I woke up yesterday - looked at myself in the mirror and just shook my head. My eczema had flared over the evening. This didn't surprise me. I just pulled out the cover up and moved on. Samantha tried her best to sleep in but ended up getting up around 7:30 am (still better than 5:30 am) .

We left the house and arrived around 11 am. She had her left leg and pelvis basic x-rays. The old bone scans that she usually gets consisted of in injection of some kind of radio-active fluid, then a 2 hour wait and the 1 hour bone scan. This time she got a PET scan, it is more detailed and she only has a 30 minute wait until the actual scan.

The result comes out in a 3 dimensional image of her body - we looked at it beginning at the top of her head all the way down to her toes - kind of like her body as a tube that we look into. All areas of high metabolic activity show up colors from blue (cool) to red (hot). Of course her brain is mostly red - lots going on there as it should be - then down to her lungs which were nice and blue with no hot spots. Further down there were a couple of expected hot spots in her left leg where she is healing and then a bit lower where she has her infection.

The good news is that she is still cancer free - took me long enough long enough - huh? :)

After hearing that great news from the docs we then turned to the talk of her ankle and the options. Not much has changed, however, Samantha had an opportunity to actually look at a prosthetic and she again asked extremely insightful questions. Dr. Heare was proud of her.

I believe after all is said and done - she is leaning back toward the amputation. The infection in her ankle has gotten a bit worse so we will definitely be taking care of things in December. Samantha wants to be able to enjoy Christmas so I am thinking it will happen on the 31st... of course this all depends on Dr. Heare.

Samantha wants some time to talk with her friends about it and then she will give me the final ok to let Dr. Heare know.

I know the next few months will be hard but we will just do it.

In the meantime - I am going to try to start sleeping again hopefully without dreaming. I have had a couple funky ones this week - from flying in an airplane when the door is opened mid flight to getting lost in an extra large parking lot where I wander around looking for my car. You don't really have to be Freud to figure those out, huh?

Isabella is finally back to normal, Daniel is trying to figure out Calculus and Jeremy is trying to find a way to deal with the stress of his job on top of all the family stress.

I think we have good game plans in place and we are looking forward to the holiday season.

Samantha has detailed the plan of her room to me and we will be working on that tomorrow. Hoping to have dinner with the uncles on Sunday to celebrate her birthday and then she is planning a party next weekend at her dad's house with her friends from school.

Back to normal! :)

Love to everyone!

Ups and downs

2008-11-04T19:56:00.005-07:00

I am very proud to be an American today. I voted after researching all the issues and I feel hopeful - the first time in a long time. Voting is such a rush - no matter which party you align with - participating is power and a privilege. Ok - enough on that.

The big kids were with their dad over the weekend, but Samantha stopped by to trick or treat at the house and said hi. Isabella was excited to go out - but even more excited to stay in and hand out candy. She sat on the mat in front of the door and every time someone came toward the house she would call out 'MOM'... totally cute.

The weather here in Denver has been fantastic - just about perfect, so we decided to head to the zoo on Saturday.
Here is Isabella and Jeremy posing on the Hippo sculpture.

We hung out at the zoo for a few hours.
The carousel is an Isabella favorite. She also enjoyed seeing the giraffes - they had 2 babies (who are much taller that Jeremy and I).

Other than that we had a pretty quiet weekend. Jeremy got to go for a mountain bike ride on Sunday - I got to clean the house - yahoo!

Isabella took some time riding her scooter and her bike. I didn't get a picture of her on her bike but maybe next time.

I loved the dress and snow boot combo - of course everything is pink - ug - just kidding! :)

Monday both kids came home and it was crazy like normal.

However, when Isabella woke up this morning - she was hot. She stayed home from school today and we have been battling a fever. Isabella doesn't get sick so it is hard to see her white and lethargic. I am hoping that the fever will break soon - but I have a feeling I won't be sleeping a bunch tonight.

Samantha is feeling good for the most part. She admitted that she is back to feeling torn about what to do with her leg. She has more questions to ask Dr. Heare on Thursday. The ankle infection did break thru the skin this past weekend so it is good that we are meeting with the doctor soon. At this point I am flying by the seat of my pants. As I have said before - I will support either decision Samantha makes, however, I have to admit I don't know how I will do it - I only know I will.

Samantha's scans are on Thursday as well. I am recognizing a sort of pattern developing. This will be 8 months cancer free but the knot in my stomach has not gotten any smaller. I recognize that I am a bit more teary, less focused and that I won't sleep well until after we get good news. Friday will be an easier day.

Samantha turns 15 on Sunday. I usually take her out to lunch and we do some shopping. This year we may be decorating her room instead of her body. We will see... I know she has plans - again I am just along for the ride (wink wink!).

Well I am going to try and stay up to find out who our new president will be - we will see if I can make it. Whether your candidate wins or loses, I hope you are proud that we live in such a great country that gives us the privilege to participate.

Love to everyone!!

Life is Good

2008-10-30T21:32:00.011-06:00

I don't know if I have used that title before - but I know I feel it often. I was certainly feeling it tonight as we drove home from a fantastic dinner. Good food at a downtown oyster bar, good company with friends and a happy Isabella and of course good wine - even better because it was happy hour. As we drove home looking at the city lights with echos of Isabella's laughter ringing in my ears - Life is good popped into my mind.

I think I am going to recount event backward tonight - I know it has been a while since I posted last. We had some running around to do downtown tonight so we decided to eat out. We had a gift certificate to a great oyster bar and decided to use it. Noah met us there and we had a really nice time. The past week has been productive for me at least. The big kids are with their dad this week so I decided to try and work from the office instead of from home. It was a bit hard since I am so used to noise and the office is quiet - but I put on my headphones and listened to some music. I recently bought some new music - Bittersweet... It has a retro easy listening sound and it really makes me feel good (always a plus!). I actually worked out 2 times this week - wow!

Yesterday we met with the prosthetic (I want to say doctor - but he really isn't a doctor) dude for lack of a better word. The whole family showed up to learn all about a below knew prosthetic. It is really amazing what is available. Samantha was a bit uncomfortable but I believe Chris and I asked all the questions she wanted us to ask. She has more questions for Dr. Heare when we meet with him Thursday, but overall she has been feeling good and doing well in school.

Last weekend the kids and I hit the pumpkin patch. Isabella was able to enjoy the jumpy slides and obstacle course, some rides with Daniel and the maze.

Both the big kids were fantastic as usual - really good sports hanging out with Isabella.

Here Samantha is following Isabella as she exhausts every possible path in the maze. Samantha so cool in her sunglasses and Isabella barely peaking up over the straw bales.

Daniel went on the mini roller coaster with Isabella - she screamed the whole time. Daniel caught some video on his phone. Once I figure out how to get it off his phone - I will post - it is pretty funny.

He barely fit into the seat - I think it is funny that he is as big as the dragon.

Samantha is part of the freshman class government. They had a booth at a trick or treat event hosted at the high school for the younger kids later Saturday night. She went as a 'Fallen Angel' - is that great or what!

She looked beautiful as usual - she and Isabella had a great time.

Sunday last, I made a spaghetti and meatball dinner from the last of the garden tomatoes. I also made a couple pumpkin pies from fresh pumpkin - it was my first time and they turned out great. Much better than pumpkin from the can.

After dinner the kids carved their pumpkins. Uncle Ike tried to be a spectator but Isabella needed some help so he jumped right in. I will take a picture Halloween night when they are all lit up with candles. We had bunches of fun gathering the seeds and designing the pumpkins.

I decided to add this picture as a bonus. Isabella played dress up this morning while I was getting ready for work. She looked so adorable I grabbed a quick picture just before she brushed her teeth.

Tomorrow, Isabella's school is hosting a Fall Open house. She is super excited for Jeremy and I to visit her school - no matter how often we do it - she never gets tired of having us visit.

It has been such a wonderful week weather wise as well. The temp has been in the mid 70s - so we are thinking a visit to the zoo this weekend will be the best thing to do before the weather turns cold.

Last weekend Jeremy and I cleaned up the garden and tilled the soil - cleaned out the composter and mowed up the leaves. The yard is sort of ready for winter. This Sunday I will probably take advantage of not having the big kids around and try to get the whole house cleaned up instead of just a few rooms here and there.

After reading about our life this past week, you can understand why I think 'life is good!'

I hope everyone else's is the same - Love to everyone!

Glad to be Home

2008-10-20T21:30:00.011-06:00

Well we left Denver on the 8 am flight on Wednesday. Isabella was full of energy but well behaved on the airplane. When we left it was 28 degrees and we arrived to a sunny warm day in San Fran.

We took the train downtown and hung out around the Embarcadaro and Pier 39. We tried to find a spot to store the luggage while we did some sight seeing - but there was nothing available. Unfortunately we had to haul the luggage around with us. As you can see from the picture - Isabella hitched a ride.

We had an oyster lunch and checked out the sea lions then hung out at a park to rest a bit. One thing I love about San Fran are the colors - there are so many beautiful plants and buildings - everywhere you look is life exploding. Even the people are colorful. I love the diversity.

I may steal the idea of the little vine cottage and create one for Isabella at our home. She loved hanging out in it!

We hopped back on the train and headed for the Oakland/Alameda area. We stayed with Ashish (Jeremy's boss) and his family. It was really nice - Jill - his wife - took such great care of us. We were totally spoiled.

On Thursday, we hung out in Monterey at the aquarium there. I think we spent close to 5 hours. Isabella checked out all the fish and there was a lot of interactive exhibits just for kids.

Here she is at one of the many touching pools. She not only got to feel seaweed and kelp, but also starfish, sea sponges and coral to name just a few.

Here she is hanging out in a big clam. One play area she was able to put on flippers and hold a fluke to see how it may feel to be a whale and move.

We watched the sea otters eat and train as well at learn about how vast and important the ocean is.

After we were able to drag Isabella out of the aquarium we headed up the coast and had dinner at a place called the Fishwife. We had a fantastic and very relaxed dinner. Our reward was this breath taking sunset. I felt really lucky that I got such a beautiful picture. Cars were stopped all along the road and folks were just hanging out watching the sun as it slowly set.

Friday we decided that we wanted to hang out at the beach since that is not something we get to do every day in Colorado.

We hung out with Jeremy's friend from college - Sonny - and his son Oliver. Oliver is about 4 and a half. He and Isabella played wonderful together most of the time.

As you can see - Isabella had a blast in the sand and water. She and Oliver played fetch with the dogs out getting exercise, tag with each other, they built sand castles and fish cars for Izi's mermaid dolls.

The water was cold so I didn't bring Isabella's swim suit - expecting her skirt to get wet but thinking that she would still be able to wear it. We were at the beach for about 20 minutes when it was too wet and we decided to take it off and let her run around in her panties.

She loved to run in and out of the waves and look for sea shells. We even saw some seals playing just beyond the surf - how cool is that?

When we were getting ready to leave, Jeremy and I took the pail - filled it with water and washed all the sand off of Isabella. We turned around to pick up our stuff and head to the car. As I looked back - there was Isabella - burying her legs in the sand. We eventually gave up - wrapped her in a towel and strapped her in the car seat. Then headed to Sonny's house to hose everything down.

We made it back to Ashish and Jill's just in time to help make a few pizzas and drink some wine. They have 2 kids as well. Nikhil is 5 and Ajay is 3. They all played so well together. Isabella misses them already.

Saturday Ashish took Jeremy and I to Sonoma for some wine tasting while Jill took the kids to a school fall carnival. California wine country is so beautiful. Their colors are changing as well. We came home with 5 bottles of wine. We had lunch in a little town close by - I had some of the best heirloom tomatoes - man! I will be picking up some seeds soon and starting them so I can have some next summer. I have been hearing a lot about them lately - but nothing I can say will match how good they taste.

We headed back to pick up Izi and then we had to head back to San Fran. We had dinner with Sonny, Sasha and Oliver then called it a night.

Here is a picture of Isabella all tucked in at the hotel bed - it is about 10 o clock and she was still wide awake.

Our flight out of San Fransisco was at 6 am Sunday. Isabella thought is was so cool waking up at 'night'.

Sunday was a nice relaxing day. Jeremy finished his book and I almost finished mine. Once I have a chance I will tell you all about it. I think a lot of folks use their blogs to share their favorite music and books - I don't know - maybe someone can share their favorites with us as well.

The big kids came home tonight and it was crazy like normal. Samantha's hair is getting long and curly. Every time I look at her, her beauty takes my breath away. Daniel is still on restrictions but he is happy enough. He got to hang out with his girlfriend a bit and he was bragging how he got 2 Bs on his Calc tests. He is doing well in school (knock on wood).

I have more to say - but I am getting tired. It is almost 11 and now that the kids are home - the days start early.

I hope everyone is enjoying their fall weather (hopefully the snow is melting up there in WY).

Love to everyone!

Brrrrr

2008-10-12T21:37:00.003-06:00

We have had a misty chilly weekend here in Denver. Each night I have been going out and covering my tomatoes and herbs. I am trying to stretch our season out as long as possible. It is supposed to be mild next week - I have so many tomatoes almost ripe...

This past week has been nice and quiet for the most part. Last weekend Daniel decided he wanted to have a party at his dad's house since it was empty. Well he got caught and was grounded this past week. Chris made it home from India yesterday and added a few more restrictions as well. It was nice having him home for a change, although he may disagree.

Samantha is doing much better. She is back in the swing of things with school and has adjusted to the new pain level in her leg. It is still red and tender but she is making it thru school with out too much Advil. She was excited to see her dad and Sharmi.

Jeremy and I will be heading out to San Francisco Wed thru Sunday. It will just be the 3 of us. He found some cheap tickets a while back and to tell you the truth I am looking forward to a relaxing vacation. His boss Ashish lives in the area and we will be staying with him and his family for most of the time. We are planning on hitting some wineries, the beach, the zoo and the aquarium. Doesn't that sound like heaven?

Last week I mentioned that we went to the wedding reception of a friend from work. His wife couldn't make it because her son was sick after a chemo treatment for Leukemia. Well the he developed a pretty serious fungal infection in his lungs and just couldn't fight it. He died yesterday. Even though I didn't know him personally - it still hit me hard. This was Leukemia - one of the highest cure rates of most children's cancers - but it was the side effects that did him in - not even the cancer. There has to be a better way to cure this stuff. Every day I hear of another child diagnosed or lose the battle... I just hope that awareness starts ramping up - I really don't understand why it is not already there.

I feel truly bless that we made it thru the past year and a half. Hug your kids, families and friends - that is all that's really important.

Tomorrow I promised Isabella that we would decorate the house for Halloween. I will try to take a some pictures and post later.

Night and love to everyone.

My Favorite Time of Year

2008-10-06T21:05:00.013-06:00

Fall is my favorite - the weather is mild and the nights are cool. The trees are starting to change colors. Here is a picture of my last crop of roses. The wonderful smell carried thru the whole main level of the house.

Well we had Isabella's "friend" birthday party this weekend at the Denver Children's Museum. She and 4 other girls played in the many exhibits. There was a full size firetruck with pint size fireman outfits and hats. There was a big tree house with tunnels and nests so that the kids could play as squirrels (Isabella) or rabbits or birds. I think this room was the favorite. There was also a grocery store and restaurant - an art center (See Samantha's work below) and a dress up and dance room. We will definitely have to go back. There was just too much to do in the time allotted.

There was also a workshop where kids could build things out of recycled wood and plastic. Isabella just liked wearing the goggles but Samantha and Bob really got into it and built a helicopter.

After the kids had some time to play, we all gathered back in the birthday room for pink cupcakes and presents. It was still quite a bit of work to bake non-artificial cupcakes (the only thing bad in them was a bit of sugar...), put together healthy munchies, goodie bags and decorations - then load everything up and get to the museum in time to set up in the 15 minutes they give you before the party starts. But the great things was at the end of the 2 hours we got to go home to a quiet house. At least for 30 minutes or so... Grand Bob stayed with the kids and Jeremy and I had to run out to a friends wedding reception. It was really nice but a sad in a way. The brides son has been battling Leukemia for a few months. They planned the wedding around it - but her son ending back in the hospital with a pretty serious infection so only the groom was present. Keep them in your thoughts - he isn't doing well at all. It still makes me cry a bit - I remember my frustration when cancer interrupted our life so many times the past year.

The week was a nice one - no commitments on any of the school nights. Just the normal routine - dinner and homework. Sam has missed some school, however. The pain in her leg is increasing. We are starting to see some redness up near the top of her incision now. I talked with Dr. Heare and he said it is not uncommon for the infection to spread thru the cadaver bone. This may rush Samantha's decision. We were hoping to make it to Christmas break and do the surgery then - but I will be surprised if that happens. She won't walk on her leg much and it hurts to wear her brace. She is determined to get back to school, missing even a few days puts her so far behind. Her dad returns from India this weekend and we will probably meet with the prosthetic doctor next week. Then once Samantha has made her decision to either fight to keep her foot or not we will meet with Dr. Heare and hammer out the rest of the details.

As I have said before - I don't have a preference, either choice will be a rough road. We are just committed to supporting Samantha's decision the best we can. She is leaning toward the amputation so she can just get on with life and I thought I was just fine with that until last Thursday - watching the infection spread and realizing the decision date was coming sooner than later. My stomach flips just thinking of her going thru another surgery. But I will follow her lead and be strong! :)

Jeremy's dad has to go home tomorrow - Isabella is sad. She has had a blast hanging out with grandpa and daddy so much. She just tags along - helping them with their projects in her skirt and fancy new jewelry. She is four now - next year she will start kindergarten - jeez!

Daniel is his same self only pushing the limits a bit more. If I live thru the next couple of years without drowning myself in wine - it will be amazing.

Samantha of course is strong and fighting to feel better - I think this time of year will help with that. We have Halloween and her birthday - then the holidays.

They are forecasting snow for Denver later in the week, so I will be picking all my veggies tomorrow and bringing my plants inside. Always stuff to do - but this time it is stuff I like to do!

I know this month is breast cancer awareness month which is great - but please think of our cancer kids every time you see the pink ribbon - maybe someday we can have a mini gold ribbon tagging along!

I hope everyone is enjoying the fall weather - Love to everyone!

A Dance and a birthday

2008-09-28T21:40:00.009-06:00

Here are my girls - posing like normal. Samantha was so excited to go to her first High School Dance!

She and her friend Donna went out to a sushi dinner all by themselves and then I picked them up and we went to another friends house for pre-dance pictures.

Sam tried a new hair style. She straightened her bangs and poofed up the curls in the back.

Here are all the girls. They felt like they were on the red carpet. All the parents were taking pictures - the flashes were non-stop.

They all looked so wonderful and they were all so excited! None of them had dates, which I for one think was wonderful. They all went and danced with everyone.

Daniel went as well - he got ready at a friends house and had bunches of fun. They all went out to Bucca De Peppo's (a family style Italian place) then to the dance and then to another friends house for after the dance. He has promised to bring me pictures. When I get them I will post.

Today was Isabella's birthday. She woke up bright and early and got dress and asked when her friends were coming over (this was at 7:30am).

We had a pretty good day and picking up the house, cooking up some pork green chili for dinner and making a chocolate 'Little Mermaid' cake.

Here is Daniel making the cake.

Poor Ariel has quite a tan - but we did our best.

She picked a chocolate cake - the funny thing is that she really doesn't like eating cake.

She was just excited to open her gifts.

Look at my beautiful 4 year old! Here she is posing with her new jewelry box from Grandma Liz.

Isabella also got the 'Camp Rock' movie from Sam, a guitar and microphone from Daniel and an kid friendly MP3 player from mom and dad.

All in all she made out.

Her 'friend' birthday party will be next weekend at the Children's museum. I think it will be fun - the best part is that I can leave the clean up to someone else!

Well - sorry for the quick update tonight - I am tired and 6am comes quick.

I am looking forward to a nice quiet week - we will see if it works out or not...

Until then - Love to everyone!

80s Day during Spirit Week

2008-09-25T22:37:00.003-06:00

It was 80s day at the kids high school today. Samantha was all excited to wear her pink tights! Daniel also showed his spirit wearing the short shorts and tank tops that totally fit in when I was growing up. However, today Daniel reminded everyone why they are NOT in style any more. I couldn't bring myself to take a picture of him - I prefer to forget what he looks like in his outfit.

Sam fit right in at school, but she felt a bit different when we were walking thru the hospital going for her checkup with Dr. Heare today. She told anyone who would listen that today was 80s day at school. I don't know why she was so self conscience - she looks absolutely adorable!

Speaking of that - the appointment went as expected. Her ankle is still red and tender. Dr Heare is pretty sure there is an infection in her ankle. It doesn't look worse but also doesn't look better.

He and Samantha talked again about her options - either the below knee amputation or the 2 stage reconstruction surgery. Samantha asked a lot of really good questions. Dr. Heare said he is looking at the surgery to happen in December over school break unless the infection gets much worse then we would have to make the decision sooner. He wants to see Samantha again in a month to evaluate and in the meantime he is going to arrange for her to meet with a prosthetic specialist to see the a real prosthetic - see her options and ask questions.

If she decides for the amputation - the recovery would be much shorter - she would begin walking 6 weeks after the surgery and probably be walking just fine without crutches before summer.

If she decides to fight for the foot - the first surgery would involve removing all plates, screws and the cadaver bone. Then put the place holder in - during this time she would be in a cast - non weight bearing for 6 weeks. Then he would go back in and start over - we would be looking at 1 to 2 more years before being able to walk without crutches.

Samantha has been talking with one of her cancer friends who has an above knee amputation and was prepared for her conversation today. I was so proud of her!

We don't have to make the decision now - but Sam is leaning toward the amputation and getting on with her life.

Either way - nothing will happen for a while yet.

I have been dreading today - even dreaming of what the doctor would say and how Samantha would handle it most nights for the past few weeks. But on the way home (which, by the way, took over an hour because I got lost trying out a new route...) I came to the conclusion that I really don't want Samantha to have to do either option. Sam asked Dr. Heare what the chances were of her healing up and not having to chose one of the above options - he said about 1-2%. But since that is not realistic, I told her that either way, we would support her decision. Both roads will be hard. Sam seems to be much more in control now. I think that having the power to make this decision will help the emotional healing if amputation turns out to be the answer. She is such a strong and amazing young woman - she told me tonight - she just wants to get to a point where a persons first impression is of her - not her crutches. She really just wants to get past this.

After the doctors appointment and the adventure getting home - I had to turn around and leave immediately after dropping Sam off at home. It was parent/teacher night at Daniel's tech school tonight. I both dread and look forward to these nights. Most teachers like Daniel and appreciate his unique view of the world but I still get disapproving looks from a few. He is taking Graphic Design and is just loving it. Once I introduced myself to his teacher, she went on and on about how talented Daniel is and how much she loves having him as a student. His physics teacher was polite but I know that Daniel is a bit of a challenge for her.

This week so far has been kind of busy - Tuesday night was parent night at Isabella's school, Wed Jeremy had to work late - today of course we had the dr appt and more teacher meetings. Tomorrow Jeremy's dad is coming in and the kids have their homecoming game and then the dance is on Saturday night. Sunday we will be celebrating Isabella's birthday with a family and friends BBQ.

I am so looking forward to sleeping in a bit this weekend. 6 am mornings are hard for me - even harder when I don't get to bed until 11:30 pm...

Night for now - Love to everyone!!!

Music, School Spirit and Cauliflower

2008-09-22T20:26:00.007-06:00

The title of this blog gives you a taste of what my day has been like today.

It is 'spirit week' at the kids high school. Today was c0llege day and Sam is super proud in her Gonzaga U t-shirt.

Daniel is at the Powder Puff game - where the girls play football and the boys are the cheer leaders.

Samantha spent most of the weekend planning out her outfits for the week. She is prepared...

I went out to my jungle of a garden to get some tomatoes for salsa and I was so excited to see a cauliflower!!! How fantastic is that? You also can see some broccoli, tomatillas (a Mexican tomato) and my one and only cucumber.

I made some fresh salsa - just waiting for chips.

It has been a while since I have used tomatillas - I decided to cook them a bit. I will let you know how it turned out. The last picture is my first fall picture - appropriate since today is the first day of fall. The pumpkin is a casualty - I was trying to get to my broccoli and I pulled up what I thought was yellow squash - but it was my one and only pumpkin plant. Oh well - we will have one green jack-o-lantern ...

Only one of my burning bushes is changing - the other 2 are still green. I don't think this pictures does it justice. The red is beautiful and vibrant!

Ellie and Leah were visiting tonight and the girls were singing - here is Isabella doing Demi Lovatos 'This is me' on You Tube. Too cute!!! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kRc5MHg6IyU

Remember that you probably won't be able to watch this thru your VPN. But take a look when you get a chance.

Jeremy missed his connecting plane so we just got home and I am ready for bed.

What a day - life is good!

Love to everyone!

Miracle Party

2008-09-21T12:05:00.012-06:00

What a wonderful night! We were a little bit late since Samantha had Paige's birthday party which ran until 5 pm. We picked her up a bit early then she quickly donned her party dress and we were off...

Just as we were walking into the party - they called Samantha's name. She went up for the introductions along with all the other cancer kids being recognized. There was music and dancing all evening.

All the kids had banners hanging thru out the room!

Here are all the kids looking so beautiful! Donna and Samantha wore masks (Donna took a break), while Isabella was a princess and Daniel was a pirate.

Notice the short hair on Daniel...

There was a lot of fun things for the younger kids to do... They had jumping castles, a dress up corner (Isabella spent most of her time there) and a pirate chest. They also had face painting. Both Samantha and Isabella took part in that...

I will put all the pictures from the party into an online album and post in the link section of the main blog page.

Pirate Daniel - he was a good sport. The music wasn't really his cup of tea and he would not dance with me at all - but I think he had a fine time any way.

Daniel got to see some friends from the cancer camps.

We also saw Dr. Ball and a couple of our favorite nurses. They were all amazed at how wonderful Samantha looked with her thick curly hair and pretty pick dress. She wore the same dress to her cancer free party although that is when she was super skinny. Now that she has filled in a bit the dress looks a bit different. (Dang it anyway!)

I can't wait until next year - I am hoping this will become a yearly event. What a wonderful opportunity to raise money and awareness as well as dance and party!

I know I talked last blog about the first ever National Childhood Cancer awareness day - but I thought I would post some of the pictures from the day.

Here are all the survivors that made it that day. Kori is giving a speech - she is the one who started Gold Ribbon Families - my mom's cancer support group.

Allison, Samantha, Jimmy and Kohl posed for a quick picture at Jimmy's lunch. He just graduated from the Young Marines program. He was a bit upset because he had to cut his hair. I think that is a re-occurring theme - after being bald for so long, they don't like getting it cut!

The next picture is all the survivors at Kyle's benefit concert - Mallory and Kennedy were able to join in this time!

Samantha is getting ready for her high school's spirit week while I once again tackle the house. Daniel asked today while Sunday is always cleaning day and I said - look around... :)

Jeremy comes home tomorrow evening and this next week we will plan Isabella's 4th birthday party. Grandbob comes in on Friday... Isabella is so excited - every day she wakes up asking how many more days until her birthday.

Well I am signing off for now - got to get to work. Happy Sunday!

Love to everyone!

Finally

2008-09-20T09:08:00.008-06:00

So so sorry for not updating in a while. It has been 2 and a half weeks - and busy weeks they have been!

So I know everyone wants to see the pictures from Make a Wish - here is the link: http://picasaweb.google.com/layergal/MakeAWish# I also included it in the link section on the main blog page as well. We had so much fun - Samantha was so beautiful and handled herself with such class. She was a bit nervous and a little on edge but nothing unexpected. The day after she actually met the boys she was a bit disappointed. I think she wanted more time with them and it was probably a bit like the day after Christmas. But she talked with other girls that had a meet and greet too - they didn't even get to talk with them - no autographs - just a quick picture and move on...

She has a much more realistic view of their lives as well. I think we all thought if we actually met our crush - they would fall in love with us, Samantha understands the reality now but still loves the Jonas Brothers - it is now just tempered.

After we returned to Denver late Wednesday night we all got a quick nights sleep and headed to the hospital for Samantha's scans on Thursday. This was a good and bad day. The good news is that her lungs are still cancer free! They decided against a full bone scan this time. This was a bit concerning to Chris and I until we talked with the doctors. They are worried about the amount of radiation and have changed the routine. For most Osteosarcoma patients they are not going to do the scans unless an area of concern pops up. Now because Sam is not the normal - they don't want to stop altogether - so they decided 2 times a year instead of 4 (unless a site of concern shows up). But the most important site is the lungs and they will continue to do the CT scan every time.

Now for the bad news, Dr Heare began preparing us for the possibility of amputation. Samantha's ankle is taking longer than normal to heal and there is a strong possibility of infection. We have an appointment with the Dr next week. We have a couple options: if the infection is not getting better - Dr Heare believes it may exist on either the plates and screws or the cadaver bone (things that don't have blood flow so that the antibiotics can't fight it). So we can remove the plate and screws which wouldn't be bad because the bones in that area have already fused together. If that doesn't work then we could remove the whole cadaver bone (put in a place marker) and flush with more antibiotics for a couple of months and then start all over with another cadaver bone. If that doesn't work then she would lose at the least the foot and part of her leg just under the knee. This process would included at least 3 more pretty major surgeries and Samantha does not do well with surgeries. Or of course Samantha could opt to not go this route and get a mid calf amputation and start on that road. This would only be one more surgery and she would be walking sooner - but with a prosthetic.

In the whole scheme of things this seems minor - I mean she is alive right? But Samantha is having a hard time with this and I am as well. I will do what ever she wants to do, but it is so hard watching her battle with this decision. We so wanted all of this to be done - go a few times a year to get the clean bill of health and continue on with our normal lives. We fooled ourselves for a while and now the reality of cancer is back on our plate.

We decided to take a break from the heavy news on Thursday and Sam went back to stay at her Dad's house while I was off to Washington and a visit with Dianna. Samantha had her friends over on Saturday to watch all the Jonas Brother's - Chris said it was 6 hours of screaming...

Dianna and I stopped at this really cool store that just screamed DAWN DAWN DAWN on the way home from the airport. You pull up to loads of flowers and pots and beautiful colors then walk into a wonderful wine store. In between the wine displays is a chocolate bar, and olive bar, a cheese bar and fresh fruit and vegetables everywhere. There was also specialty pastas and all natural meats and fish. We had such a fantastic time there - I could have spent my whole month paycheck there if we stayed long enough.

On Saturday I got to watch Sal play in his opening football game in the Seattle' Quest football stadium. Of course his team won - it was pretty cool. Sunday we were off to a resort on the Washington coast - a total girls weekend with the beach, flowers, ocean, bloody marys, wine, great food, a massage and best of all uninterrupted conversation with my best friend. I have already started saving for next year! Here on some pictures - the first is the perfect meal, olives, cheese, chocolate and wine. The next picture is from our hang out spot on the pier and the last is the looking back to the shoreline. We wrapped up the long weekend with a visit to Dianna's favorite nursery and an Italian lunch before taking me to the airport. It was the perfect ending to the crazy weeks prior.

The following weekend was the first ever National Childhood Cancer Awareness day - Sept 13th!

We made it to the park to listen to a couple doctors speak and a representative from Senator Allard's office. One talk really hit home - he started off saying that our turnout (which was relatively small) was about the same size as the first ever breast cancer awareness day. So we have hope that Childhood cancer will get the kind of attention it deserves eventually. He mentioned that a better database management system is needed and of course money to improve the survival rate. But one thing really caught my attention - we are so focused on getting that cancer out of our children's bodies - and once it is gone we forget that they now have a life time of side effects to deal with. There really are no resources in place - no programs to work with the kids once they have survived. I know on caring bridge I mentioned meeting an adult survivor and her battle totally changed her view on life and she is still battling with the fallout. There is emotional and physical considerations that are not address right now and raising awareness will help them deal later on...

I just read where a new clinic opened up for adult survivors of childhood cancer. Just for regular check ups - now they have a place to go where their doctors have knowledge of the side effects from chemo. It is fantastic because most general practitioners wouldn't normally take these into consideration when aches pop up later in life.

Anyway the weekend was great - we hooked up with Jimmy to celebrate his graduation from the young Marines and then off to a benefit concert for Kyle who lost the battle last year.

Sunday was spent cleaning the house (it desperately needed it!) and this past week I tried to get caught up on work. I had Samantha's physical therapy on Wed, teacher's conferences for the big kids and Jeremy flew out to Tennessee to watch Damian race in the 4X4 finals. He was going to sneak out about 3 am Thursday morning to catch the bus to the airport, but he woke up late and I had to drive him instead at 4 am. Friday, the kids and I headed out to the mall to get Isabella her princess dress for the Miracle Party and Ughs(boots) for Samantha. I promised that I would buy them when both feet could wear them. :)

Then today is the MIRACLE PARTY! We have some last minute items to pick up - Daniel is getting his hair cut and Sam needs to pick up a gift for her friends birthday part (also today).

The party is from 5 pm to 10 pm and I think it will be a lot of fun. I didn't get to help as much as I wanted (they hired an event coordinator and decorator) but that is probably for the best. I don't know where I could have squeezed that in over the last month...

Sorry for the long blog. I won't let this much time pass again.
Sam's dr. appt is next Thursday. I will post pictures from the party tomorrow and keep everyone updated on Sam's decision about her ankle.

Love to everyone!!!

Wedding and a Wish

2008-09-01T20:27:00.007-06:00

Ok - the wedding activities officially started Thursday evening - dinner and Mendie (Indian henna tattoo) party. Wonderful food and music and my hand was painted. It is so beautiful. That is one thing the women of India do well - the tattoo and gowns are so beautiful!

Then on Friday - we headed up to Winter Park and had another wonderful dinner - this time with Italian food and music. Jeremy found a big bike as well. The front tire is as tall as he is!

Saturday morning - after a quick bike ride - Jeremy got all done up - he was one of Ajay's men...

There was a prayer ceremony for the groom and his family then it is tradition for all those on the groom's side to dance him to the ceremony.

Here are my other 2 beautiful children - for once Daniel didn't make a funny face.

As you can see the day was perfect.

Here is Ajay riding the horse to ceremony.

Here are his men dancing in front of Ajay - the rest of the groom side guests are dancing behind.

Jeremy acted like he was going to just blend in and avoid it - but he was out there dancing up a storm - it was super fun. I talked to Gina's girls and they had to wait away from the crowd and make sure no one saw her before she entered into the ceremony.

I wanted to take more pictures - but Isabella was a bit crazy and could not sit still. Then Isabella turned on the camera and drained the battery.

The rest of the evening was super fun - another night of good food, music and dancing.

Sunday we woke up early - packed up and headed back to Denver. We made in plenty of time to catch the limo and we were off to the airport.

We made it into College State PA about 11 pm EST and finally got everyone in their rooms and asleep around 1 am.

Monday morning Isabella woke up and was in her swim suit before I could open my eyes...

So after everyone else was up and we got a quick breakfast, we hit the pool. Samantha's ankle isn't quite healed so she could not put her ankle in the water - but she found a creative way to still get into the pool and jacuzzi any way - the first time in over a year.

After the pool we were off again. Make-a-wish got the family tickets to a local amusement park. We all had a fun time - this was Isabella's first time and she found a favorite ride. She and Sam road the caterpillar roller coaster 3 times in a row!

I have pictures but I decided that I would put them all together in a slide show instead of trying to document all of them now - so stay tuned!

Right now it is late and tomorrow is the DAY! Good night and love to everyone!

Guess it is time to update

2008-08-27T21:31:00.004-06:00

Sorry about the delay. The big kids have been with their dad and aside from over doing it at a birthday party for Jeremy the home front has been pretty quiet - busy but quiet.

I am too old and I got another reminder bright and early Sunday morning. Too much wine - not enough food or sleep makes for a long recovery period. Once a year I am reminded why I don't like drinking too much. It took me all of Sunday to recover and I am just now having a glass of wine. Those that know me - now realize how bad I was to go without wine for 4 days. :)

Well enough about that - the kids are all doing well in school. Samantha seems to be enjoying it - she has been doing PT and homework. Daniel's X-box had a problem so he has been without it for 2 weeks so he has actually been getting out and hanging in person with his friends.

Recently we got some really exciting news! Samantha's Make-a-wish came thru - very last minute. We finally got all the details down and will be getting our packet tomorrow. Samantha, Daniel, Isabella, Chris and I will be flying out of Denver this Sunday at noon to State College, PA to attend a Jonas Brother concert (that's right another JB concert - but this time I won't be driving and should be able to have a glass of wine!) and then Samantha and 2 guests will be escorted back stage to meet all 3 Jonas Brothers! Samantha is on cloud nine!! ten even!! We went out today to get a dress for the special occasion.

While this is very exciting for Sam - it means that I will have an extremely busy couple of weeks ( like it wasn't already). Here is the plan - Jeremy and I have dinner tomorrow night with the Kapoor family then we leave about 1 pm on Friday for Winter Park for Ajay and Gina's Wedding. There is a dinner Friday night - the wedding on Saturday - another simple brunch on Sunday morning. We may have to leave Winter Park a bit early on Sunday because we need to be back at the house by noon. The limo will be by to pick us all up and take us to the airport where we will fly out to PA. The step parents would be able to go but we would have had to buy their airfare and on short notice that was not cheap. Samantha will only have eyes for the JBros anyway and only 4 can go back to actually meet them so Jeremy or Sharmi would not be able to see the meet either. Both elected to hold down the fort in Denver.

The concert is on Tuesday evening and then we fly back to Denver on Wednesday. Thursday Samantha has her full day of scans and then if that is all ok I will be flying out again but this time to Seattle to see Dianna! Yeah! We have been planning this for a while and I had just bought the plane ticket a couple days before all the Make-a-wish stuff came up. The good news is that my week of jet setting will end with a relaxing visit and a massage.

I don't know about anyone else - but I am not going to move in October - no events are planned (other than Halloween) and I am not going anywhere unless I can get there via my bike!!!

I don't think that is realistic - but I can dream!

I will take as many pictures as I can over the next week and post as often as I can.

Love to everyone - it is bedtime and I will need my rest!

Nice and Relaxing

2008-08-19T22:00:00.003-06:00

As I mentioned in the earlier post - the kids and I took off bright and early Monday morning and drove to Cody to visit the family. The drive was ok - 8 hours in the van with 3 kids isn't fantastic - but the kids were!

It was so nice to spend some down time with my mom. The kids and I got to see my Grandma and Grandpa H and both my aunts - auntie Rae and aunt Becky. I wish we could have seen auntie Rae a bit more but she worked during the day and has a bum shoulder and needed to rest in the evenings. I also got to see my cousins Steph and Robin for a bit. It is so weird - I always feel so young around them - it is hard to believe that we all have children in high school...

We had a fantastic BBQ at my cousin TG's house. Heather was away on business but Brian, her husband, Mariah and Gabe stopped by. TG's house is really cute and they are starting to make it their own.

On Wed we spent some time with Keegan (his 2 year old son). Isabella had so much fun. She loved spending time with Grandma and Keegan. She is so good with younger kids - every time she says "see how nice I am mom - can we get a baby too?"

On Thursday we drove into Yellowstone National Park. I have been there a few times now - but I forget how beautiful it is - it takes my breathe away. Mom and George took us into the park - it was fun listening to all the places they hung out when they were younger.

Here is a buffalo on the side of the rode. We didn't see any other animals - but we saw so many beautiful wild flowers!

We saw Old Faithful - Isabella was amazed and excited that when it went up some of the water came down on top of us because of the wind. We ate some lunch - picked up some souvenirs and then piled back into the van and headed for home.

I know my mother loves having us visit - but I also thinks she appreciates her semi-quiet life much more after we leave. Isabella hung on her and the volume level is always high with her around - she talks and talks and talks.

Our ride back to Denver was wet - it rained almost the whole way. We didn't get to see Jeremy right away - he was the support team for one of his friends who was running the Leadville 100 - that is right - running 100 miles above 10,000 feet elevation - is that crazy or what?

Meanwhile - I took Samantha to get a first day of school outfit and Isabella got a new pair of school shoes.

I can't believe that school has started and summer is almost over. It flew by... We still have a couple big events coming up. First we have our friend's wedding then I am hoping to get up to see Dianna for a weekend. Then we have Sept 13 - the first National Pediatric Cancer awareness day- events. Then on Sept 20 - we will get all dressed up for the Miracle Party. Check out the website - http://www.miracleparty.org/ - Sam is on it. If anyone wants to buy tickets or to just donate - you can do it there.

We finish up the month by celebrating Isabella's 4th birthday. She asks daily about it - it is so cute. I think she wants to ride her bike but has decided that she needs to be 4 before she can do it - lol.

Before you know it, fall will be here (my favorite time!) and the holiday season - man time just flies.

I am going to sign off for now but I will post tomorrow with info on how the kids first day of high school went - stay tuned!

Love to everyone!

Jeremy Raced Lance Armstrong

2008-08-19T21:21:00.012-06:00

Sorry it has taken so long to update. We have been busy busy busy. First we will start with Jeremy's Race. I think he did fantastic. We started the day early - up at 5am so we could get him into town and ready to start his ride at 6:30am.

Can you believe Daniel got up and came with - of his own accord? He was a great help!

Here is Jeremy at mile 40 - looking good. Isabella sat by the side of the rode with her pom poms until Jeremy rode in - but didn't want him to leave.

Shortly after Jeremy passed thru - Lance and the leader Dave Wiens flew by in the other direction. They went thru so fast but it was really cool getting this picture and being so close to such a strong athlete - even if it only lasted a second.

Here is Isabella and Reno - patiently waiting.

Ya hoo! Jeremy crossed the finish line in 11 hours and 31 minutes. His goal is to beat 12 hours. He was super tired and wanted to sit and eat. Needless to say he slept well that night.

The next morning we went to pick up his belt buckle - hand made - beautiful. If he can do the race in under 9 hours he gets a really BIG belt buckle.

Lance finished second - Dave Wiens did the race in 6 hours and 45 minutes.

All in all it was a wonderful weekend - not too much rain and not too much sun. We made it home Sunday afternoon. Just in time to unpack his smelly clothes and for the kids and I to pack up for Cody. (see the next update!)

Sam is out of Surgery

2008-08-06T11:36:00.003-06:00

Sam is awake and watching Family Feud - we are trying to get a hold on her pain and then we will be able to go home.

Dr. Heare loosened up some scar tissue so that the skin won't pull as much. We are hoping these last 2 small sites will heal up.

All in all she is looking good. Dr. Ball (her oncologist) stopped by to say hi just after she got a dose of morphine - she started crying and said how much she missed him! It was cute.

She will be taking it easy for about 5 days and then should be back to normal.

I will post again in a bit - love!

Just a Touch Up - Sam's Surgery

2008-08-06T10:02:00.003-06:00

Well Samantha is in Surgery now - just a quick touch up. She has been going strong with her physical therapy and overdid one of the exercises. Her leg was a bit swollen so we decided to have Dr. Heare check it out. When he did he also removed the last of her stitches. Well once the stitches were removed - the scabs fell off and she has a couple of places that did heal up together.

So Dr. Heare scheduled a quick surgery for her this morning to close them up again. It will be relatively quick - 30 minutes or so for Dr. Heare's part and then about an hour in the recovery room.

We are expecting the after surgery pain to be way less than she has experienced in the past - she may be a little sore but not for long.

It is such a weird feeling being back in the hospital waiting room - drinking hospital coffee. Everything familiar, even the old worries. I don't think I will ever get used to seeing Samantha go under.

I will post again as soon as I have a chance after she wakes up.

Love to everyone!

Fun in the Sun

2008-08-03T20:16:00.015-06:00

Not too much to update - Thursday was Fair Days at Isabella's school, Adventure Montessori. They had one big end of summer blast complete with popcorn, snowcones, cotton candy, jumping castles and lots of games. Jeremy worked on putting the most of the games together and then went into Isabella's school and he and the kids drilled, glued and sanded.

Here is Isabella getting ready to race on her hobby horse.

Cowgirl Izi Lizzy!

Plinko game - That is Isabella's head peaking up!

Cowboy Dad!

Bean bag toss - the kids and teachers decorated all the games Jeremy and Iz created.

Below you see Jeremy and Isabella in the sack race - Isabella left Jeremy in the dust - She is just a blur in the second picture. Amazing!

Samantha super excited to be hanging with the kids.

The first place Isabella went was the cotton candy.

Then we finished up in the face painting room - Isabella chose a butterfly on her face and for her balloon animal as well.

What a fun afternoon - Jeremy did a fantastic job on all the games - the teachers loved it.

Friday Jeremy did some last minute running around to prepare for Ajay's bachelor party. Samantha had another physical therapy appointment and she is doing wonderful (although she has been a bit sore over the weekend).

Then for Friday night - Sam, Iz and I went out for Sushi and then I dropped her at her dads for the week.

Saturday I was able to fit in a bit of shopping - Daniel broke Isabella's Jasmine doll so one of the stops was to the Disney store. It was Isabella's first time and she thought it was the best. She had such a big smile - I have many birthday ideas for her now.

Saturday night I went to Gina's bachelorette party which was nice and relaxing.

Sunday was chores for me - but Daniel went mountain biking with his friend. This is his first time in almost 6 years. He really wanted to go - but really doesn't have all the gear needed. He improvised... He is wearing one of Jeremy's bike jerseys and under his pajama bottoms he has some bike shorts at least. But the funny part is that he doesn't even have tennis shoes - he is wearing his Vans.

Needless to say - his feet slipped a bit when trying to pedal up the trail. He came back confessing he puked once and proudly showing me his scraped up knee and elbow. (he didn't come close to winning - my 4th of July crash looked way worse!)

He has not been a real big fan of exercise so I think he was a bit surprised that biking was so hard - but he had fun and is planning on doing it again soon. We will be getting him some appropriate gear so he doesn't have to work quite as hard.

Boy - I guess I did have a lot to update. I am hoping this week will be quiet - I plan on trying to get out and ride my bike a bit - keep caught up on the house and wash. Jeremy's 100 mile mountain bike ride is on Saturday and get this - Lance Armstrong will be riding this year! I probably won't see him because I am there to support Jeremy - but I plan on bringing one of Sam's Flashes of Hope pictures for him to autograph just in case.

Then we are off to Cody to hang with the grandparents.

Ok - night and Love to everyone!

Eye of the Storm

2008-07-30T21:19:00.003-06:00

The day started out pretty normal - but took a quick turn about 9 am this morning. Jeremy was packing up to head to the tipi, Isabella was angry with me because I wouldn't let her wear her dirty clothes from yesterday. I got them out the door when I got a customer call.

At one point I was instant messaging with 3 different people while on a conference call and encouraging Samantha to get dressed and ready for her physical therapy appointment.

I usually don't stress if I have to run out to an appointment during the work day because I have email on my phone. However, I am getting the royal run around from work when it comes to getting a replacement for my phone since I dropped it.

So I had to leave in the middle of my customer escalation. I ran Sam to PT then headed over to Panera Bread because they have free wireless. I checked my email there and then back to pick up Samantha from PT. Then I had to run to pickup Isabella before running to pick up Daniel. See Daniel had an appointment to retake his hearing test - Isabella had to come with since we only pay for school until 4:30 pm.

Well we made it to Daniel's test (which he passed with flying colors - no more excuses that he didn't hear me) only 2 minutes late.

After I had to hit the grocery store - we went to one that had the little 'shoppers in training' shopping carts. Daniel was pushing the regular sized one and Isabella had the smaller one. I only needed a few items - but I am sure you can picture Isabella - grabbing items she wants off the shelves - the funny thing is Daniel and Samantha were doing the same thing - they can just debate better.

We took over the store - there was one wide eyed gentleman - you could tell he didn't have kids - he just looked amazed as I repeatedly asked the kids to stop shopping and move towards the checkout.

There was one point on the drive home where all 3 kids had their bare feet in each other face - singing 'smell my feet' at the top of their lungs - I am talking about my 16 and 14 year old as well. I feel like I have been nagging the kids a lot lately so I decided since they were having fun and laughing I would just let the extra noise slide.

Now I have 2 out of the 3 in bed and I am looking around my house. The dogs were wrestling and dumped over things - the kitchen is a mess from dinner - Isabella was looking for her princess dolls and proceeded to spread every color book, crayon and sticker book all over the floor.

Tomorrow will be another busy day - lots to do on my list - but Daniel will be out working and Samantha is making plans to go to a movie. So I may have some quiet. :)

Jeremy should be back from the tipi in time to go with me to Isabella's summer fair days tomorrow.

I think I have expended all the energy I can tonight. Time to recharge.

I will post pictures tomorrow - and call my mom!

Love to everyone!

Courage Classic Day 3 - We did it!

2008-07-28T23:03:00.007-06:00

Today's ride was about 33 miles. The little red dot was the finish line. You can see how the first 12 miles is all uphill. Jeremy was wonderful and stayed with me and we rode for a while - rested for a while - then rode some more. The only part that is wrong is the fact that on the map it shows it going downhill into the finish. It was NOT downhill - uphill all the way for last 6 miles - at this point I am not a big fan of uphill bike riding! :)

We did reach the Summit at mile 12 - I tell you the added 2000 feet really did make a difference. My legs felt great - my lungs however, were a different story.

It was very emotional for me today and I was trying to figure out why. I will apologize right at the beginning - I don't really like thinking super deep - but I think that over the past year there was so many things I wanted to do for Samantha. I wanted to take her cancer for her, I wanted to take away her pain - I wanted to help her walk and heal and not be sick. I couldn't do any of that, but I could ride my bike for 3 days for her. When we hit the summit (of the ride that I didn't think I could do) it was like I could finally do something for her. She is probably thinking - my mom is a freak - but that is it. Jeremy was very patient with me and was such a great support all day. It was a hard but really fun weekend.
Here we are crossing the finish line - Jeremy with his mom and me with Isabella. Almost immediately after I crossed the finish line - Daniel handed me Isabella. She was crying and I barely had time to grab my medal....

It was fantastic to see Samantha, Daniel and Isabella as we crossed the finish line.

We finished up rather quickly - got back to the condo to do a quick clean up and pack the van and then a drive back to Denver in the pouring rain.

Damian (Jeremy's brother) came up and made us a fabulous dinner while I drank some wine and Jeremy drank some beer and we relaxed. All in all it was a wonderful weekend.

Tomorrow is back to work for me but Jeremy is taking the whole week off. I will write more then - tonight I believe I am ready for bed.

Love to everyone!

Courage Classic Day Two

2008-07-27T20:01:00.006-06:00

Today was a wonderful day - the ride was absolutely beautiful. I did about 40 miles and Jeremy did about 51. Today was family ride day so they had many different options depending on how you felt. the shortest ride was about 35 and the longest was 98. I felt good about doing something in the middle. The above picture is the 4 of us at the Dillon Dam aid station. It was a beautiful day. We left this location and continued onto Blue River which was another 14 miles - mostly down hill. I rode this section with Jeremy and I was able to draft behind him at a pretty good pace. It was the most fun for me yet. Then while Jeremy continued to the top of the pass (another 12 miles up and down) I had to make my way back - but this time it was uphill. One of the riders hollered out "what goes down has to go up!" She was so right. I prefer to go up first and then finish with a nice downhill. But I made it. Jeremy and I hooked back up at the Dillon Dam aid station again.

There is Jeremy after we hooked up at the aid station. The other picture is of the lake we rode around.

While Jeremy and I were riding. The rest of the family hit the outlet mall over in Silverthorne. After the ride we showered (the first thing Sam said to me when I got home was - you stink!) and ate a bit. Then we headed to Vail to hang out with some friends. We wrapped up the day with a couple of pizzas and some TV.

It is about 8:30 pm now and I am ready for bed.

Tomorrows ride will be a long hard uphill for about 12 miles, finishing at 11,300 feet. Then about a 14 mile downhill - another 4 mile climb and a quick mile downhill. The total mileage for tomorrow will be about 34. There is also an option to do a 10 mile loop around Turquoise Lake - but I think we may have to pass so we have time to get back and clean up the condo and back to Denver by 5 or 6.

I am excited to cross the finish line wearing our Super Sam shirts.

Until tomorrow - Love to everyone!

Courage Classic Day One

2008-07-26T20:51:00.005-06:00

The course ride was 58.10 miles and I personally did 50 miles. Daniel woke up bright and early with us (6 am) and dropped us up in Leadville. There were 2 mountain passes and "Battle Mountain". The picture to the left was our route. The bottom graph is the elevation. The first pass was not easy but not too hard. Battle Mountain was super steep(the pimple on the elevation map) but only a couple miles long. But the last pass did me in. We ate lunch in Vail and from there to the top of the pass was 18 or 19 miles. I decided to save the last 8 miles of the climb for next year. There have vans called 'sag wagons' that come pick up and shuttle you to the next aid station. I was pretty disappointed that I couldn't carry on but it would have taken me too long. I really wanted to do all the ride for Samantha - but my fitness level just wasn't there. The good news is that Jeremy, AJ and Gina all did the full ride for her.

Tomorrows ride is a relatively easy one - there is a bike path from Copper Mountain Ski resort all the way to Breckenridge (these are Colorado Ski towns). It will be a beautiful ride thru the trees. The mountain wildflowers are beautiful. I need to find my camera - I forgot it today. It is somewhere in the condo we are staying in but we have 7 people staying in a 2 bedroom place. So things are everywhere. :)

I am ready to hit the sack - so I will sign off for tonight. As you can see - Jeremy is already out. :)
Love to everyone!

OMG - I can't believe I got to see the Jonas Brothers

2008-07-22T08:16:00.002-06:00

I know it has been a while but time just slips away. I usually like to add entries at the end of the day - but the evenings have been busy. The kids got back from camp Saturday afternoon. We had an hour together before we left to go to the Jonas Brothers concert. Samantha, 2 friends and Isabella piled into the van and we hit the road. Daniel didn't get to see Tom Petty - he got home from camp a bit too late and he was tired anyway. Apparently both kids stayed up all night their last night at camp. Both of them had loads of fun!

Anyway - back to the concert... there were so many kids and people and it was really warm. Fiddlers Green was not the best venue - long lines everywhere and a bit disorganized - but the girls found a good spot and we settled in. Every time anyone walked on stage - every girl screamed - holy moly.

I know that I was the same way when I was younger - but it was still fun to sit back and watch all the hysteria. Isabella had a great time as well. I had to hold her on my shoulders for most of the concert so she could see - she was clapping and dancing - so cute. I wish I had some pictures - but I followed the rule that said no cameras and I had dropped my phone Saturday morning, so I couldn't use that either.

Sunday we spent the day relaxing and doing some house chores. The kids headed back to their dad's yesterday afternoon and will hang out there until Friday when we head to the mountains for the Courage Classic. I am a little nervous - I went for a ride on Sunday evening and my knee feels ok - a little weak - but ok. I just keep telling myself all I can do is my best. I am still going to try and keep it all fun. I really do enjoy riding my bike so I am going to focus on that.

Jeremy's mom and cousin Hannah come in on Thursday afternoon. We are all excited to see them and hang out in the mountains. I am especially glad for the vacation time. This weekend is the start of a couple of very busy months. After the Courage Classic - Jeremy has Ajay's bachelor party (I also have Gina's bachelor-ette party) then the next weekend is Jeremy's 100 mile off road Leadville ride. Then the kids and I (and maybe even Jeremy - we are working on that) will head for a weeks vacation in Cody and spend some time with my Mom and all our family there. I am looking forward to visiting with my Grandma and Grandpa - it has been a while and we miss them!

After Cody we then have Ajay and Gina's wedding - another fun weekend in the mountains. I am then hoping to go and visit my friend Dianna for a spa weekend the first week of Sept. Then the rest of September will attending some Pediatric Cancer awareness events on the very first awareness day ever -- Sept 13th! We also have at the Miracle Party on Sept 20th. We are close to having a web site with all the info - I will post it when it is ready.

Not to mention in all this that the kids start school in about 4 weeks. Daniel will be a Junior and Sam a Freshman (another Holy Moly). Samantha is starting physical therapy today. She wants to start school without her crutches - however, she really isn't too motivated to work on it at home. I feel myself nagging her and I don't like that at all. So I decided to let the PT guys do that... Her leg looks good and she is only using the crutches as a safety net - I am sure she can meet her goal with a bit of work.

We will have her next round of scans in Sept as well - can you believe that it will be 6 months? It seems like it was a lifetime ago but at the same time yesterday...

Well I need to get back to work. I have some pictures of Sam from camp that I am loading into another slide show. Hopefully I can add that later today.

Until then - Love to everyone!

Tag - Along

2008-07-14T20:45:00.007-06:00

Isabella has started to ride the tag-a-long with Jeremy. She gets so excited to put on her helmet and ride. You would think that as much as we like to ride bikes in our home that she would be a natural. Izi got a bike for her first birthday, but she doesn't like to ride it. Even now that she tried the tag-a-long and loves it - she is determined not to ride her bike until she is 4.

Tonight was really warm and so we decided to hit the park. I don't know if you can tell from the pictures above (I tried to get close) but she is wearing her signature skirt with her princess flip flops. I just think it is so funny that she does everything in her skirt.

Well the big kids got off to camp just fine. Samantha was a bit subdued, but she got to see Savannah (her companion from Wapiyapi) and Daniel found his camp friends as well. It is a beautiful camp North West of where we live - about an hour and a half drive.

They will be coming home on Saturday morning - which is super busy already. Chris will be picking the kids up because Isabella has a birthday party. Saturday - Jeremy will be doing his 50 mile mountain bike race as well. Then we have the big Jonas Brothers concert. So far I have an extra ticket - one of Samantha's friends can't make it. I suppose if I can't find someone to buy it - Isabella will be going. Poor Daniel - he has his hopes on going to Tom Petty - but tickets are $100 a piece and Chris has a scheduling conflict. I know Chris is still working on it - but it may be a long shot.

I got on my bike tonight and my knee feels good - I didn't push it - but I think with some Advil and ice - I will try a long ride this weekend.

Oh - something I have been trying to forget - but my laptop crashed again Saturday morning. It just won't power up (I am using Samantha's - which doesn't like me much either it seems). The IT guys think it is a bad system board. I am hoping to get it replaced and be back in business tomorrow afternoon - keep your fingers crossed that the hard drive was not affected.

Ok - I am signing off for tonight - boring I know - but I just had to share Isabella's pictures. I don't know if I just forgot what Dan and Sam were like at this age - or if I was just too busy during that time of our life (we had just moved into a new home and I was getting that in order and starting to go back to work) - but I just love that Isabella has such a great imagination. She turns everything into a story and of course is constantly talking. I think the drama in her life is mellowing out - she seems to laugh a lot more and it is easier for me lately to get her smiling.

Well - I hope everyone is laughing and smiling more often too - Love you all!

Sister bonding

2008-07-11T20:31:00.006-06:00

Well we have a bit of sister bonding going on tonight. All in all it is a good thing but poor Jeremy is having a small heart attack.

Samantha is super excited because The Jonas Brothers are coming to Denver and I gave the ok for us to go. Chris gets to take Daniel to Tom Petty and I get the Disney band (just wait until next time!) Anyway the concert is next weekend and like I mentioned - Daniel will be at Tom Petty with his dad, Jeremy has a 50 mile mountain bike ride so he won't be home - we were talking about finding a place for Isabella when one of Samantha's friends found out she couldn't go. Samantha opened her mouth and said "Donna is out and you, Isabella are in!" Well this started it all. All the way home from dinner (tonight was uncles dinner) Samantha and Isabella listen to Jonas Brother songs. Needless to say Isabella is now excited that she gets to go with Samantha (which by the way is still up in the air). It was kind of cute - Samantha was telling Izi who her favorite brother is and Isabella said "you are going to have to find a little Jonas brother for me!" The video above is Isabella singing part of a Jonas Brothers song...

This was something I wasn't prepared for when we decided to have Isabella. I thought that having 1 kid would be a breeze after having 2 little ones at the same time. I wasn't prepared to have 2 real teenagers and another teenager in a 3 year old body.

It is always nice when one of my teenagers gets in touch with their inner 3 year old. Here the girls are coloring together. :)

Thank goodness today is Friday. Jeremy spent his morning working at Isabella's school. He volunteered to do some wood working with the kids and was in turn asked to do pull together some carnival games. He has been using all his new tools to start making some hobby horses, a plinko game and a couple of those boards that have pictures painted on it with holes cut out so you can put your face in and have a picture taken. He had 3 classes of 3 to 5 year olds. They did some sanding, sawing and drilling this time. Next time they will do some painting and gluing. Then at the end of the summer program they will have a carnival. I will make sure to take lots of pictures so we can document all Jeremy's hard work.

Tomorrow morning I have to get up too early. I volunteered to shuttle the boys (Jeremy, Noah and Ajay) up to Kenoshaw pass. I drop them off up there and they will ride the Colorado Trail into Breckenridge. It is a long ride but wonderful training for Jeremy as he prepares for his mountain bike races.

I was hoping to get a really mellow bike ride in this weekend but I don't know if I can yet. I tried to ride to the pharmacy today and my knee was all wobbly and felt like it would fail any time I tried putting any pressure on it. I felt a bit discouraged since I don't have much time left before the CC. My emotions are hot and cold. My brain tells me just raising the money and doing what I can is all that is important, but I really want to do this for my daughter. I don't think she realizes my intention, but this ride will be hard work for me - nothing compared to what she has been thru - but all the same, I want to do this for her. At the end of the day - all I can do is my best. I will definitely ride across the finish line thinking how strong my daughter is and remembering how proud I am of her.

Well I am going to sign off for now. Have a great weekend. Love to everyone!

Comedy of Errors

2008-07-09T21:07:00.005-06:00

UG - Aren't I purty? I finally gave in and decided I would put a picture up. I look so much better than I did. I have actually left the house a couple times - wearing my sun glasses of course.

Every time I see myself in the mirror - I am amazed that I crashed. What other 41 year old suburban mom do you see with 2 black eyes?

Want to hear something funny? Last night - in the middle of the night, I thought I heard Samantha calling my name. So I jumped out of bed out of a deep sleep and hustled out the room. The funny thing was our bedroom door was closed (this is not the normal - but the dogs were acting up) so I ended up literally running into the door full speed. Needless to say I woke up Jeremy as I stumbled down the stairs holding my nose to Samantha's room. She was not calling me - I got to her room and she was snuggled up sleeping soundly. I made it back upstairs and climbed back into bed. My nose was throbbing like crazy but as my heart rate slowed back down I couldn't help but laugh at myself. I couldn't believe I had hit my face again! Jeremy just shook his head and asked if I was ok - his life is never boring with me around.

Other than smashing my face multiple times - life is pretty normal. Samantha and Daniel came home Monday evening. Samantha spent yesterday relaxing and hanging out with her friend Donna. Daniel had another orthodontist appointment - turns out he needs another retainer ($$$). Tonight the kids are with their dad at a Journey concert. Anyone with one of SuperSam's healing tunes knows she loves Journey.

We are hoping to have an uncles dinner on Friday night and then the kids are off to Sky High Hope Camp on Sunday.

I am hoping to get a bike ride in this weekend - I sprained my knee when we crashed on Friday(totally take after my mom) and the doctor said to keep it rested and iced for the next few weeks - so the ride won't be too long.

Jeremy will get a nice long ride in on Saturday - he is riding part of the Colorado Trail, a 6 hour mountain bike ride. He is training for the Leadville 100 - his race is in August. His ankle is getting back to normal, I think he only has a couple more PT appointments. He is so good at doing his exercises.

I hope everyone is doing well! Love to everyone! Leave us some comments so we know how everyone else is doing... we love to hear from you all!

Happy 4th of July!!!

2008-07-05T20:56:00.013-06:00

Hi all! We had a wonderful week - just plugging along mainly. Samantha came over for dinner on Tuesday - actually she ate at the mall - bit we played a game of Life and then watched a new television show she is interested in. It is called 'The Secret Life of the American Teenager" and it is about a 16 year old girl who finds out she is pregnant. We have only watched the first episode but I think it will be ok. Better than America's next top model or Gossip Girl - both which I think set unrealistic expectations on how life is supposed to be.

The new show was a bit shocking to Samantha in that sex is a big topic in most of the conversations - but the thing I like is that so far it is realistic. Another good aspect is that it opened up a nice conversation between Samantha and myself. Obviously after everything we have been thru this past year - if I found out Samantha was pregnant - it would not be the end of the world. Any new life would be welcomed - however, I did stress that it does not mean I am encouraging her to go out and get pregnant. I still expect her to make good decisions.

Take a look at Samantha fohawk -- I tried to capture it...

Thursday she came back over for dinner - we all went together to a friends house warming. We have friends that found a house in the Washington Park area of Denver. It is a fantastic neighborhood and houses there are priced pretty high. But it is something that is worth it to our friends - they are a few blocks off of the park and their home is beautiful - very European feeling. Fitting since one of them is from England and the other from Italy. They are super nice people and the food was fantastic!

Then for Friday - Jeremy, Isabella and I spent some time at the Boulder Reservoir - Isabella had a blast playing in the water and sand. It was a hot day and the water kept us comfortable.

Later that evening we packed up the tandem and Isabella's chariot and headed off to the city park to watch the fireworks. We met Daniel and Samantha there (they were hanging out with their dad). Fireworks were great. The night would have been perfect but on the way home Jeremy and I crashed on the bike. We were not going fast but hit the side of the sidewalk and the bike tipped. Most people think to protect their faces and end up with scrapes on their arms and legs - but no so luck for me. I broke my fall with my face. It looks a lot worse than it feels - but I hate that now everyone can tell that I don't know how to put out my arms when I fall. :)

Today - Jeremy spent time working on the supplies for Isabella's school carnival and I have been pretty lazy - doing some wash and watching TV. I was supposed to go for a bike ride on Sunday - but my right knee is a bit swollen from yesterday so I am passing. I am sure I will be able to do a short ride tomorrow night or Monday.

Both kids are coming home on Monday and will stay with me until Sunday when I take them to camp again. I love that they are going even though I miss them terribly when they are gone. Samantha is getting more and more independent and it is a wonderful time for brother and sister bonding. I can't believe we have 20 more days until the Courage Classic and then I am hoping to take a week vacation in August and go visit my Mom. I was thinking this week would work - but Sam has a concert she wants to go to and I am covering for a co-worker.

I am going to leave you with a couple really cool videos - one of Samantha walking and one of Isabella singing. Am I blessed or what!

Love to all!

Another Sunny Sunday

2008-06-29T21:40:00.003-06:00

Samantha got back from camp on Thursday afternoon. She had a great time but was ready to be home. She traveled with many of the kids she went thru chemo with - but because she was the oldest - she didn't get to camp with them. She was kept super busy and loves to brag how she beeped going thru airport security and that she kissed a fish... Yep you heard that one right. She wrote a whole story about her camp experience and has bunches and bunches of pictures. I thought I had all the pictures and was going to put together a slide show - but low and behold - they are missing.

Samantha is with her dad this next week - so as soon as I get her story and the corresponding pictures I will put it all together. There is another camp she want to go to - I have to get the paper work in tomorrow and Sam and Daniel will head off to camp again on July 13th.

Everyone else is doing well. Daniel is having a great time - working when catering gigs come up and then relaxing all the other times. He gets to sleep in until noon everyday - oh I how I miss those days... :) I try to sleep in every once in a while - but I usually only make it to 8am or so.

Daniel got a chance to go to the Renaissance Festival and he came home with a funny looking shirt declaring he has found his calling. I will try to get a picture and post it later. Then today there was a day long concert and he and his friends went. We ran into a little dilemma today. Daniel wanted the van to go to his concert, Jeremy went up to the land to set up the tipi and I had the Miracle 2008 party planning meeting. With only 2 cars - I decided to ride my bike to the meeting - need to train for the Courage Classic. My ride was 23 miles to the meeting - so I got a 45 mile ride under my belt. For the most part I feel good - a bit tired. I think I need to plan my meals better so I can keep my energy level up for the whole ride.

Just think that in 5 weeks - I will do the same mileage 3 days in a row. I guess the true measure will be how I feel tomorrow!

Needless to say I am ready to hit the sack so I will be signing off for now.

As soon as the Miracle 2008 Party web site is up and running - I will post it.

Until then - Love to everyone!

Camp time again

2008-06-23T21:49:00.005-06:00

Saturday we spent doing just a bit of shopping so Sam could get ready camp. Apparently my toilet bag wasn't exactly what she wanted. Samantha and Isabella decided first thing in the morning that they wanted to make brownies. So we set off in search of brownie ingredients and a make up bag.

We were successful - Isabella went down for a rest reluctantly (as always) and Samantha relaxed a bit.

There was a Relay for Life (cancer fundraiser) for the city of Parker. This year they agreed to feature Gold Ribbon Families (my mom's support group). Apparently the National Cancer Society wants to highlight GRF nationally so we decided to go show our support. Samantha got a special 'survivor' purple T-shirt and did the first lap. It was probably only a quarter of a mile but I was so proud of her!

We saw some familiar faces like Hope and Brando as well as meeting a new face. Her name is Mallory. Mallory is battling Leukemia and I believe has 1 year left. She is only a year younger than Sam so they hung out for most of the night.

Aren't they cute in their purple shirts! Brando was super cute as well - I think he did the lap in 2 minutes. He just took off and I have a feeling he doesn't stop for too long. :)

We stayed for a few hours and then headed back up north - Parker is a suburb of Denver - but while we are north west, Parker is South east. The night was beautiful so it worked out.

Once home - Samantha and Isabella made their brownies and Sam finished packing. I had to make a late night run to get some candy for Sam's plane ride - so very important!

We got to bed around 11 or so and I set my alarm for 3:45am. Yep that is right - we had to be at the airport by 4:30am.

We arrived right on time to a bunch of smiling faces. The kids were so excited. Sam went to camp with Allison, Kennedy, Jimmy, Kyle, Abby and a couple other new faces.

Here they all are with their counselors - Tonia and Jane. Samantha was a bit nervous. This was the first time she has flown alone. She did fantastic - Allison and Sam are close in age and I think with get along wonderfully. Sam is the oldest of the group...

I got a phone call from her when they landed in NC and she told me that she did indeed beep going thru security and had to get patted down in a special room - even with a doctors note.

But they made it and even though she sounded a bit tired - she also sounded excited. I know they will have a blast but I miss her already. She will be flying back in on Thursday. This is a great experience for all these kids. They get a chance to feel independent again after such a hard journey.

After I dropped Sam at the airport - I was able to catch a couple more hours of sleep. Then I took advantage of Jeremy being home and went for a bike ride. I did about 20 miles in and hour and a half. I felt good and strong. I kind of winged my route - if there was any type of hill - I took it. I didn't find anything like I will see during the Courage Classic - but I keep telling myself every little bit helps. After my ride - I treated myself to a massage - so nice.

We topped off the day by hanging out listening to some free Jazz down in Denver's City park with some friends. We had a picnic and drank some wine and watched the kids play.

Jeremy and I laughed today as we told each other our 'to do' lists - they are never ending. The week is already planned out and it is only Monday.

I am going to sign off now with a special request. Please keep another child in your prayers. Our friend Thomas Buck was placed in hospice today. He had some aches and pains and his MRI showed that his tumor came back. The doctors have done all they can. His mother is one of the nicest people I have ever met. Every time we crossed paths - she always was smiling and always asked about Sam. She cried happy tears when we saw her on our way out from our last chemo treatment. They have fought so hard for so long... They have a care page - carepage.com and the page name is ThomasBuck.

Good night - Love to everyone!

Quick update

2008-06-20T22:29:00.004-06:00

Just a quick update - let me know if the You tube link works. I have also found that you can choose to watch it in standard or high quality. High quality is definitely better.

I will put Isabella's continent song and some other videos we have. This may be fun! :)

night again - Love to everyone!

I know, I know - it has been a while

2008-06-20T21:17:00.007-06:00

Believe it or not - I have actually been working on this blog each night this week. Isabella danced on Saturday and I recorded it with my digital camera. But it turned out that the file was almost 400mg - way too much to load directly onto the blog. I figured this out after trying to upload it all night Sunday night. So then on Monday I figured I did something wrong and tried again...

Tuesday I finally decided I should trim it down a bit. Guess what? To trim and avi file you need an avi file trimmer. I downloaded that and started that process on Tuesday night. I was able to get it down to 280mg. Still too big, so Jeremy suggested converting it to an mpeg. So I went back online and found an avi to mpeg converter. I did that on Wed - but the file was still 200mg.

I decided to try a direct upload to the blog again. I started it Thursday evening - I think about 8:30 pm - I woke up at 7:30 am this morning and it was still uploading. I decided to give up and try You Tube. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7S8X6AWvSCM . I just watched and the video is a bit blurry - I am going to try to go back and load the original uncut version to see if it is any better. But until then you at least have something to look at.

So now I have to learn how to add and display videos on You Tube. I hope it works.

I will start with Isabella's Dance - the one that I trimmed down. She was pretty cute.

Sunday was a nice day. Daniel and Samantha headed over to their dad's house after camp to spend fathers day.

Jeremy did a bike ride on Sunday while Isabella and I took care of some things at the house and prepared for father's day dinner.

Uncle Ike and Jeremy's friend Brad came over for some BBQ and beers. It was a nice relaxing day.

Monday was back to work. Samantha also had a prosthetic brace fitting on Monday. Right now she wears a boot cast - it is a Velcro black thing - kind of big with a rocker foot.

The new brace is lighter weight and she was supposed to be able to wear a shoe with it. We went to pick it up Thursday afternoon. Samantha tried her big tennis shoe and her crock - but neither would work. I think when she gets back from this next camp we will have to go back in and see what they can do to trim it down a bit.

Daniel was finally added to the family insurance this week and he spared no time asking to use the van. I think he stays up all night figuring out a new reason he needs to use it. Today he said he needed it to do some job searching.

Samantha came home on Tuesday night but Daniel decided to stay at his dad's for the whole week. I have seen him almost everyday when he needed to use the van however. He is working both Saturday and Sunday - helping out Chris' friend Matthew who is a caterer.

We will be hitting the Parker relay for life Saturday evening. We didn't sign up to do the event since Samantha is flying out so early Sunday morning - but we are heading out to provide some support for those folks who will be walking all night.

Samantha needs to be at the airport by 4:30am - she will then fly with her fellow campers and counselors to North Carolina - to camp Victory Junction. She will then return Thursday afternoon.

She found another camp called Sky High Hope camp and that is the 3rd week of July. Both her and Daniel had so much fun at Wapiyapi they want to do this one as well.

I have 6 weeks left to get into shape for the Courage Classic. I ride almost daily - not long rides but I always pull Isabella. This weekend I am hoping to get a longer ride in - we are heading up to the property in Alma. Jeremy will put the tipi back up and I am going to try to ride the pass between Alma and Breckenridge. I guess I will get a better idea of how I will fare on the actual ride. Even though I haven't lost gobs of weight - I feel pretty strong. Each time I have to fill up the van with gas - I get more motivated to ride my bike.

This next week - since Sam will be at camp - maybe I won't have to drive the van at all. Wednesday is ride to work day. I try to do it every year.

I don't have Samantha's camp pictures put together in a slide show yet - but stay tuned. Hopefully tomorrow or Sunday.

Until then - I think I am going to sign off and finish enjoying the movie with the family.

Night - and love to everyone!

Quiet time without the Big Kids

2008-06-11T21:49:00.004-06:00

The kids are scheduled to come home on Friday morning. They are going to go to their dad's for father's day weekend - but at least they will be in town and I can talk to them. I know they are having a great time - but I miss them both.

We have been doing ok this week. Monday was a bike ride to the park with Isabella. Yesterday, Tues, Jeremy and I took a drive to down to Aurora and ate at a restaurant that was having a benefit for Justin Miller. Then I stopped by Jenna's funeral. Service was slow at the restaurant so I got there late. There were so many people there - I had to leave before I had a chance to talk with Jenna's mom and dad. I waited over an hour but Isabella was getting tired. I didn't take her in - she hung out with Dad and played at the church park. I felt like running out of the church many times but in the end I am glad I stopped by. Even though I didn't get to speak to the family - I know they saw me and I hope they know that Jenna is in our thoughts.

Tonight was quiet as well - I could get used to this - wink wink...

Good night - love to everyone!

Lots of Pictures

2008-06-09T21:47:00.013-06:00

Yahoo - it is sushi time. Samantha was in heaven - she stuffed herself with good food -finally!

Daniel loves sushi too - I will keel over if I can ever get a normal picture of my son.

Uncle Ike and close friend Garth - celebrating with us.

Not only were we celebrating Samantha's wonderful scans, but Uncle Mike's birthday was last week. He is so excited to finally hit his 30s -- lol.

Isabella is slurping her lemonade. She is not a big sushi fan yet - so she shared Uncle Mike's dinner.

Friday was a wonderful day -Daniel had a friend hang out and they watched movies and played some video games. Samantha had her friend come over as well. I ended up taking the whole gang to the mall - (surprise!) Actually it was really pleasant. Samantha's friend stayed over. Then Saturday -we all loaded into the minivan to get Daniel to work. He ended up helping his dad's friend (who is a caterer) all day and evening. The rest of us headed over to friends for a wonderful dinner.

Then Sunday arrived. The kids finished up packing and we all loaded back into the minivan for a trip into the mountains - up near Estes Lake - Camp Wapiyapi time!

We arrived to cheers, smiles and hugs - all around. Sam was a bit nervous - although she would never admit it - but she is a trouper. I think this week up there will be wonderful for both Sam and Daniel. I miss them terribly...

After we dropped off Samantha and Daniel - Isabella and I hit the trail. She had a class assignment to fill up a nature bag since they are studying mountains and plains this week at her summer program. We had a wonderful time.

Big Tree - above.

Itsy bitsy - teeny tiny tree.

We hiked until snow started falling - it wasn't much but we were pretty high (at the base of Long's Peak) so it was kind of chilly.

After Isabella filled the bag - we hopped back into the van and headed home.

We did a wonderful bike ride tonight (Monday) - took a bath and headed for bed. So normal and ho hum... The house is so quiet.

Please say a prayer for a member of our hospital family - Jenna Anderson died Thursday evening from the cancer she had been battling. I didn't see much of Jenna - she usually was feeling crummy - but I talked with her mother a lot. She was devoted to taking care of Jenna - always moving and grooving on her behalf. I am going to try to go to the funeral tomorrow. I want to show support - but it will be really hard - can't lie about that. Again - I am so grateful for our family. Samantha's beautiful smile is always on my mind - I want all families to be as lucky as us!

There is also a fund raiser for Justin Miller - so I am going to try and stop by there as well.

Positive energy to the Anderson and Miller families!!!

Love to everyone - big hugs all around.

I LOVE scan day!

2008-06-05T14:56:00.004-06:00

Sound a bit different than yesterday? Well Sam has finished up all her scans and x-rays and every one of them looked wonderful! She is still free and clear of cancer!

Yahoo!

She got the ok to have sushi for dinner so that will be our next stop.

I will post later with pictures from dinner.
Yahoo! again!

Love to everyone!

Tossing and Turning

2008-06-04T20:45:00.009-06:00

The last couple of days have been a bit hard. You know - just when you think you have a handle on things - your mind steps up ...

Yesterday was Samantha's last day of middle school. She is now officially in high school. I remember back when it was Daniel and I remember how hard it was. I was scared for Daniel to go to high school - wondering if he was ready. I know it is necessary for our kids to become more independent - but sometimes it is hard. I miss the days when I could hold Daniel and Samantha in my lap like I can Isabella now.

Anyway at the 8th grade ceremony - Samantha was awarded the Comet Courage Award. To tell you the truth I was looking forward to it as well as dreading it. We have been plugging along day by day - doing just fine and blocking out the past year. To have it recognized in such a public way - I knew it would be hard for Samantha who still doesn't tell anyone that she had cancer. But she really deserves the award - she is so strong and she is an example - I am so proud of her and I would love everyone to know what she has accomplished.

The following picture is her accepting her award. Here is what her teachers had to say:

Every once in a while, you get a student that shows more than an ability for academic achievement or athletics. Once in a while, you get a student that shows so much courage that no matter how bad your day is, you just look at that student and what you are dealing with simply melts away. Samantha Gray is that student.

Samantha came back to Century while recovering from a very serious illness during the school year. She literally bounced back into classes and devoured every bit of information that she could. Her enthusiasm, passion for school and her passion for life has certainly made a difference with everyone she has come into contact with. Her courage and determination to battle and beat her illness has taught us all a great deal about what it is to really look at life and look past some of the smaller things we deal within middle school.

The Liberty Core would like to recognize Samantha's enthusiasm, passion and determination with our Comet Courage Award. Thanks for coming back, thanks for not giving up and most importantly thanks for teaching us about the bigger things in life.

She began crying almost immediately - needless to say so did Jeremy, Chris and myself. She received a standing ovation and the presenter - her history teacher was also all choked up. I am so proud of her - I can't say it enough.

My BEAUTIFUL girl!!!

The rest of the afternoon I spent following her around while she got her friends to sign her yearbook.

Yesterday was also Daniel's last day of school. He did ok and will finish up the year with a solid B average. He will be able to drive soon. Both of them had friends over in the afternoon and again all day today.

Daniel will have to start looking for a job. June is pretty booked for them but July and August are still up in the air.

Tomorrow we have to be at the hospital by 7am. I haven't slept - tossing and turning - for the last couple of nights. This time is definitely harder than the first time. Deep down I knew last time that there had not been enough time for the cancer to grow since the end of chemo. This time however, 3 months have passed. If it does come back - most of the time it comes back in the lungs. We will be paying a lot of attention to the CT scan tomorrow.

I was doing fine - but as I mentioned in the last post - Justin's cancer just came back after a 15 month remission. They also found some suspicious nodules in another girls lungs we met this past year - Kate. Her mother told us how hard it was to get that news and watch as her daughter cried hearing the news. They have not confirmed cancer yet - they have to watch to see if they grow - they may just be calcified (I think that is the term). But even if it isn't, it is heartbreaking to think of the uncertainty Kate and her family are feeling right now.

I was reading an article on children's cancer a couple of days ago. Thru out the article, it kept mentioning how rare children's cancer really is - I can tell you that it doesn't feel rare at all. 2 children in Samantha's 8th grade class had cancer in the last year. Allison and Jimmy go to the same school in Colorado Springs... Kori's son and another child from mothers group live in the same neighborhood. Is it rare everywhere else? Just common here in Colorado?

I was reading a caring bridge of a mother who lost her son in March - she listed about 20 people to pray for who had also lost their children to cancer. That just seems like way too many.

I am going to add this link to my links section of the blog: www.thepetitionsite.com/1/gold-ribbon-support-for-childrens-cancer-on-consumer-products Please go here and sign this petition. It is for adding a gold ribbon (similar to the pink one for breast cancer) onto consumer products to raise awareness of childhood cancer.

Sorry for being so mushy tonight. I know that living with this uncertainty is now a part of life - but it is a little more in my face just before scan day.

I know scans will be clean and we will be celebrating with a sushi dinner tomorrow evening. My mood will be bright again! :)

Until then - Love to everyone!

Where do I start?

2008-06-01T22:10:00.004-06:00

Well first off some good news:
United States Senate
For Release:May 23, 2008
Contact: Steve Wymer (Allard) 202-224-6207 Clinton Press Office - 202-224-2243
Senate Passes Allard-Clinton
‘National Childhood Cancer Awareness Day’ Resolution

Washington, D.C. – September 13, 2008 will now be recognized as “National Childhood Cancer Awareness Day” as a result of a Senate resolution introduced by U.S. Senators Wayne Allard (R-Colo.) and Hillary Rodham Clinton (D-NY).

“Never before in history has the dream of eliminating childhood cancer been so attainable, yet seemed so elusive,” said Senator Allard. “We live in a nation where the effectiveness of treatments and technology offer hope to children who dream of a bright future. Each case of childhood cancer is a very personal tragedy that can strike any family with children, at anytime, anywhere. In setting aside September 13th to recognize this battle on cancer, we continue of our efforts to draw attention to the victims of childhood cancer and the great work of the families and organizations who continue the fight.”

"We have made tremendous strides in the fight against childhood cancer, but far too many children still suffer and lose their lives to this illness. The more we know as a nation the better able we will be to prevent and treat the disease and help those who are battling and surviving pediatric cancers. National Childhood Cancer Awareness Day is an opportunity to reach out to all Americans with the facts about childhood cancer, and this day will be an important symbol of our commitment on all days to find a cure," said Senator Clinton.

Childhood cancer is the number one disease killer and the second overall leading cause of death of children in the United States. More than 10,000 children under the age of 15 in the United States are diagnosed with cancer annually.

The above was a press release. A step forward for a cure for childhood cancer. On the heals of this wonderful news - we found out that another child who had been in remission for 15 months had his cancer come back in his brain. I just met his mother at the Miracle 2008 party planning meeting. She was so positive and has started a Justin Time foundation to give back. This was hard news for me to take - Samantha has her next set of scans on Thursday. She is super excited for this milestone. At 3 months her doctors told her she can have Sushi again and that she can stop taking one of her antibiotics. I know that her scans will be clean - I know it!

Well the good news is that we stay so busy I don't have too much time to dwell. Speaking of which - Isabella has a yearly 'Culture Day' where the families celebrate different cultures with food and a small presentation. For some reason I thought this was on Friday - but as I was dropping Isabella off at school Thursday morning at 9 am I found out it was that same day at 10:30 am. So I rushed home to finish the cookies (we signed up to bring Grandma's cookies - Italian biscotti) and print off a quick map of Italy/Sicily. I made it back to her school in time to enjoy all the wonderful presentations - we have a families from Ireland, Germany, Spain, Mexico and India. We are really lucky to live where we do and learn from so many.

Ok - moving on - Friday Samantha and I went to the play Mamma Mia. I have created a monster... We got dressed up and went out for a nice dinner then off to the theatre. She had a wonderful time and absolutely loved it and wants to do it again and again.

Here is the picture of Sam after the show. Look at how much hair she has! She is doing well in school - 3 As and a B. Can you believe that... After a year of kicking cancer's butt, she can step right in and do the same at her school. Most of the time she is smiling and planning. Full days still tire her out a bit but she is getting better and better. I know the doctors will be impressed with her progress.

Daniel is doing great as well. He is anxious for school to be out - he only has 2 more days of finals before he is done. He watched Isabella for us on Friday night. Jeremy had a couple of commitments and Daniel likes earning money - so it worked out for everyone.

On Saturday - we spent it at home. The house was calling out for some attention since we were gone last weekend. Isabella needed some sandals and another bathing suite - she was so excited to get some pink flip flops that light up when she walks.

On Sunday - Jeremy and Daniel went up to the land to take down the tipi. Isabella and I did some power cleaning, mowed the yard and then headed to the zoo for the afternoon. We have been many times - but this is the first time that Isabella got really excited. First we watched the seals at mealtime - she giggled and giggled. Then we wandered - had some ice cream and hit some of her favorites.

I don't know if you can see - but behind Isabella there are some goslings. She was pretty excited.

Yummy chocolate ice cream.

Isabella insisted on seeing the penguins. Then we were off to see her favorite - the elephants.

This elephant was taking water with his trunk and spitting it back onto the ground to make mud. The it would pick it back up and squirt into onto itself. Isabella was laughing again!

Well we made it home and decided to chill out the rest of the evening. Jeremy is watching a movie and I just looked at the clock - 10:52 pm - way too late for me. It seems that I can't get to bed before 11 anymore. The days start early - can you believe it is already June? - Holy Moly.

Oh well - one day at a time. Night and Love to everyone!

Cozy

2008-05-27T21:52:00.007-06:00

So you may have heard that the weather here in Denver has been a bit overcast the past couple of days. Well this morning Isabella decided she wanted to feel 'cozy' and insisted on wearing everything. She looked so dang cute - I couldn't find her hat right away so she decided to wear Jeremy's. We had to roll it up a bit. The funny thing is that she wouldn't wear her rain boots - only her sandals.

Samantha was up late last night working on her end of year project for school. She put together a time line of her life so far. She has included all the life changing events of she has experienced so far and then a couple of stories from her grandparents and some poems she wrote. I am excited to read it.

Daniel stayed home this past weekend to work a catering job. He really enjoyed making some money and is super excited about the next one coming up in a couple of weeks.

Both of them are with their dad this week but I usually get to see them after school for a few. Samantha and I also have tickets to see the Broadway play Mamma Mia - you know Samantha and her musicals...

Jeremy took the day off to work on Mike's toilet (fun fun) and to get some physical therapy on his ankle - which by the way is coming along wonderfully.

I just worked, hit my WW meeting and got an allergy shot - so very exciting. But I did get a great recipe from WW for a Warm White Bean Salad. I had some Lupini beans so I sauteed some tomatoes, peppers, onion and garlic. Then firsts I added some sage from my herb garden. It tasted wonderful - I also tried it with some fresh oregano and basil - also very good and good for me - yahoo!

I am going to leave you with a more cute pictures of Isabella. She made her own pizza for dinner tonight.

Night and love to everyone!

Memorial Day Weekend

2008-05-26T21:44:00.009-06:00

We spent a wonderful relaxing weekend in Gunnison with friends. They have a 1 and half year old boy and he and Isabella played and played. She isn't used to being the oldest - so it was good for her. She had to work on patience - I think that is the hardest trait sometimes.

Samantha loved being out of town. On the way over we checked out the tipi and decided that it needed some attention so Jeremy and I will be planning another weekend up there to get it into shape. A tree fell over this winter (a big evergreen) and some of the tipi poles need to be turned. It is still pretty cold up there but with some warm clothes I think we can handle an over night trip.

We rented a pontoon boat on Sunday. It was quite the adventure - the engine had trouble starting a couple of times. We turned it off to fish a bit and just drift and enjoy the sun. But as we drifted closer to the rocks the engine got stubborn. We had to use our 1 paddle and one of Samantha's crutches to push away from the big rocks. At one point Jeremy was on shore pulling the boat along the coast line while Bill (our friend) was paddling and I was keeping the boat out of the rocks. Just when we thought the motor was warmed up enough to handle a rest - it would get stubborn again and not start. After about 4 hours we called it a day even though we were fish less. Samantha loved driving the boat, she did a pretty good job and even Isabella took a turn sitting on dad's lap and steering. Isabella and Burk kept trying to convince us they were just fine without the life vest - but that was a no go.

After the boat ride the kids played more at the house and Sam and I took a drive up to Crested Butte. There is still a lot of snow up on the mountain but the little ski town is coming along. Spring is just starting there...

After another 'super sleepover' as Isabella called it - Susan made us some awesome pumpkin waffles for breakfast - yum! Then Samantha got to go for a ride with Bill in his Roadster.

All in all it was a wonderful weekend. Gunnison life is so laid back and simple. It is a really nice change from the big city. Jeremy went to college there and every time we visit he starts planning on a way to get back. You never know - we just might end up there someday - once the big kids are in college..

Tornados...

2008-05-23T22:00:00.007-06:00

Well if you haven't heard we have had some severe weather here in Colorado. They hit yesterday a bit north east of us in Windsor and Greeley. I got a call from my mom just after they hit wondering if I was ok - we were. I looked out and only saw sun from my work window.

But I was looking over the pictures from yesterday and was amazed at the damage done in such a short time. It motivated me to back up my pictures and make sure they are all in the basement and safe. Although we are too close to the foothills - tornadoes don't touch down close to us.

All in all the week hasn't been too bad for the kids and myself. Jeremy had a rough one - he is a coach or manager and there were layoffs this week. He is super glad we have a long weekend. We are heading to Gunnison for the weekend to chill with some friends. Not much planned other than visiting and maybe some fishing and a boat ride.

Today was pajama day at Isabella's school today. I wish I would have got a picture but didn't think of it. The mornings are kind of crazy at times. School for Dan and Sam is almost over, I think they have have 7 more days left. A quick reminder for Mom Thomson - Samantha's assignment is due on Tuesday - so don't forget to send your story to her this weekend. Thanks!

Daniel had some friends over - his friend wanted to dye his hair blond. It turned out ok - not super blond but he was happy enough.

We then decorated Samantha's room a bit. She had some pictures she wanted me to hang and the Chinese lamp in the picture. She thinks her room looks so 'zen' now. Samantha loves to decorate her room. The problem is she gets and idea and by the time we get the stuff she wants, she changes her mind and wants something else.

Just before she got sick last year she picked out a comforter and all these colors. Now she is tired and wants to change again. I told her she needs to get a job - mine can't pay for it again so soon. :)

Well it is time to sign off - I am going to go sit in the jacuzzi and hit the sack. I can't believe it is already 10:30 pm. The days just fly.

Love to everyone!

OMG

2008-05-21T21:18:00.003-06:00

We are sitting here watching American Idol. Only my daughter battling cancer could have got me to watch this show. I have tried so hard to avoid reality TV but she loves this show along with a couple others -- America's Top Model and Beauty and the Geek...

I was pleasantly surprised - I don't know if it is always like this but there was a couple of bluesy and hippy type singers. Samantha loved Jason - who can blame her with eyes like his...

Anyway she has been pretty excited all day. I think only Samantha could have gotten Jeremy involved as well. He doesn't watch much TV at all much less reality. But Samantha recorded each show and wouldn't watch it until Jeremy was ready.

Daniel is hanging out in his room - he protests against AI - he likes 'indie' music (independent) and creativity and you don't really find that on this show. Oh well enough of that.

Samantha stayed home from school today - her leg has been bothering her - she has been walking a lot and keeping busy. Today was a short day at school so I gave her the ok. She finished reading one book and started another one.

Isabella came home yesterday and was telling us about a little boy in her class - his name is Arnov and he told her that she was the 'beautifulest' and she thought he was a 'very handsome young man as well'. No kidding - her exact words. Arnov is right though - the kid has good taste! I will try to post a close up of her tomorrow - she has some adorable freckles popping up on her cheeks and nose. That is one thing this blog is good at - reminding me to take pictures. Daniel accuses me of being obsessed with this blog - but I just get excited for the opportunity to record our life.

I found these books on sale at the book store - they were for mother's or grandmother's. Kind of like a baby book only for them instead of a new baby. I got kind of excited. My mom and grandmother and Jeremy's mom live far away so they can't share the stories with us as often. I think it is really important to learn what it was like for them - what they thought of and wished for when they started their families .

It is cool to think I can print this out and pass it on - I wonder how weird my grandchildren will think I am...

Alrighty - I am calling a night. It was a good day - got my first strawberry and the spinach and arugula are popping up - my annuals in the front are still there - they just may win the fight against the bugs...

Daniel has a presentation tomorrow and Sam will be heading back to school - they are both almost done.

Love to everyone!

Ice Cubes In My Wine

2008-05-19T22:14:00.005-06:00

It is after 10pm and it is still hot hot hot. I know that this isn't anything compared to later this summer, I am wishing that the cool rainy days would have lasted a bit longer. I guess I just have to get used the the warmer weather. On days like today I add ice to my wine. My friend's father is a wine distributor and connoisseur and he just cringes when he sees me do this. But to be honest, I drink wine because I like it - not because of what people think of me. When Jeremy and I were in Italy a couple of years ago, their red wine was cool (as in temperature). I don't feel I am in the wrong at all. I don't have a wine cellar, so my wine is room temperature and when the room is 80 degrees the wine needs a few ice cubes...

The weekend was nice and relaxing. I puttered around mostly. I finished up the planting around the house. Here you see Isabella helping me water the new plants. She just woke up from her nap and was still kind of groggy holding onto her teddy bear. I put together a slide show of my yard. I did it mainly for me ( I love my yard) but I can share... Isabella's friends came over Saturday morning and it was already warm. So we hit the road to pick up a swimming pool. The 3 girls had a blast playing in the pool which was cold and then heading for the warmth of the jacuzzi. The following link includes some of those pictures as well.
http://picasaweb.google.com/layergal/YardWork/photo#s5201906343545335666. Saturday night Jeremy had an old friend over. He had not seen him in 15 years or so - they have been friends since 2nd grade. They stayed up late yapping and having a few beers.

Then on Sunday, I had my normal chores to do - but I also participated in the second Miracle 2008 party planning meeting. I am sure you know about this if you have been keeping up with Kennedy's site at all. I think we are close to having a venue and date. We are hoping for September 13th. Colorado Senator Allard and Senator Hillary Clinton co-sponsored a request to make Sept 13th the first ever Pediatric Cancer Awareness Day. This is pretty big - this is how Breast Cancer awareness started - first a month then a day and then the pink ribbons you see every where. How wonderful would it be to have that same kind of attention on children's cancer. How wonderful would it be to wipe it out forever...

The kids are back home tonight and believe it or not it wasn't as hectic as normal. Daniel had a quick check up for his wisdom teeth - they are looking great. The doctor was very happy. Then I dropped the girls off at home after school to relax while Daniel and I rode our bikes to the grocery store. We loaded up on groceries and came home to pull some dinner together.

Daniel had some homework, Sam had her dramas to catch up on and Isabella played outside. I was telling Jeremy earlier this evening that I thought she was getting more difficult - but after a glass of wine and some quiet time, I think she is just independent. She loves to play with her friends - they are super important to her right now. I think what I see as difficult is actually my problem. I want her to still need me more than she does now. She would rather hang out with the girl across the street instead of me... Isabella hit this stage a bit earlier than Daniel and Samantha. I think they were in kindergarten. Oh well guess it is time for another kid or dog... JUST KIDDING... Jeremy would have a heart attack :)

We are planning to get out of town this weekend and I was hoping Daniel would be able to make it - but he has a job with a caterer and there is a party on Monday. So he opted to stay back and work instead. I knew this day was coming as well - but man is it hard. This weekend isn't anything big - just hanging out with some friends so I couldn't really make him go. He wants to show the boss how committed he is. I can only be proud.

Well it is time for bed. Daniel is complaining that the jacuzzi is only at 102 instead of 104... Time for him to get to bed.

Until tomorrow - Love to everyone!

Mother/Father

2008-05-15T22:15:00.005-06:00

A little video of Isabella singing her continents song. She has been quite a character the last few days. She has started calling Jeremy and I father and mother instead of mommy and daddy. She will just talk - she makes up these elaborate stories and there are some nights she has endless energy. The grocery store has miniature grocery baskets and she took one yesterday when we had some shopping to do. She just started shopping - putting things in her basket... The items I picked out, I had to carry. She wouldn't let me use her basket.

Right now she lives for Dora or Diego shows and playing with her friends. She will do anything - including take a nap - if she can invite a friend over. There is a wonderful little girl that lives across the street. She is in kindergarten now - but she and Isabella play great together. She has so much patience with her, I am always impressed.

She still won't ride her bike and she is getting a bit big for the chariot (we pull it behind our bike). I get quite a workout whenever I take her on the trails.

Work is going ok for me personally but the company is doing another round of lay offs. I don't think I am meant for corporate work - their decisions don't make a lot of sense to me. But until Samantha is healthy and the kids are thru college, I just have to bite the bullet. The benefits are actually more valuable than the salary.

I like the weather we have been having lately. It is cool and rainy. Low temperatures are high enough that I can plant. I finished up the herb garden and the vegetable garden last night and I started planting some annuals in the front garden. I will try and post some pictures this weekend. I think it will be cool to see how the gardens change over the summer.

Jeremy and I get a date night tomorrow. Yahoo! I don't know what the plan is yet - Jeremy is working out the details but it will be nice to get out and hang with my husband a bit. Then I am hoping to get a couple bike rides in this weekend. Jeremy says he wants to ride too - his ankle is ok - the bruising is gone but it still aches and by the end of the day he is hobbling. I also will be going to the next Miracle 2008 party planning meeting on Sunday.

Hopefully I can finish up my planting and get my tomato supports done. There is always so much to do.

Well night for now - Love to everyone!

Mother's Night

2008-05-13T22:06:00.002-06:00

Every second Tuesday of the month is Mom's night - a support group for mothers of kids with cancer. It can be good thing and a hard thing...

Today started a bit rocky. Work and family were throwing things at me from all angles. Isabella didn't get to school until 10 this morning. But the day settled down, the big kids are with their dad this week and I was looking forward to my Mom's night out. The group meets way south in Denver - it is a 45 minute drive for me but it is nice to talk with other moms about life. There are moms there with children at all the different stages - some in treatment, some who have lost children and some with kids that are in remission. That is the good part - I feel normal there - my worries are normal and my current distraction (for the lack of a better word) is normal.

There was a visitor tonight - a 25 year old cancer survivor joined the group. She had Leukemia when she was 5 and was in treatment for 3 years. When she was in treatment, her family was told that kids survive this - it will be ok. But they never saw any of those survivors. So when she started college she decided to give back by being the face of a survivor. I don't know if there are adequate words to express how wonderful it is to meet people like her. The few long term survivors that we have met - I cling to their stories. I remind myself whenever the doubts pop up that they are out there - we have met them. So it was really nice to hear from this gal. One question popped up - she was asked if there was any long term emotional side effects - we all know the health ones... Anyway she said that she didn't think she had any until she decided to start meeting with families. She said that she has been diagnosed with post traumatic stress syndrome. Now the hard part... she is in counselling and is doing fine - still out there helping families like us. But as I was driving home I was thinking about her. I haven't asked 'why my daughter' in a long time. Pretty early on in treatment I just moved into my do what you need to do phase. There were more times than I can count when I was angry that Sam had cancer, that she had to deal with the things she did, that she won't be able to wear heels - I know this one is silly but the point is she doesn't have the choice now. It was decided by cancer. There are days when the scars on her body are positive - they are like trophies to remind her how strong she is - but then there are days where they are just reminders that my daughter can't walk on her own yet - that she had to experience pain and the knowledge that she could die. No child should have to be afraid of those things. The hard part knowing that even after her body is healed and she is walking without her crutches she may still feel alone or different later on in life when she is trying to find her identity.

She doesn't even realize what is ahead of her yet - she is sleeping now - all snuggled up in her pink bed with her Ugly dolls. But I know.

Alright - enough of this mushy stuff. I try not to dwell too often, we will just do what we have to do. I am actually getting used the the fact that nothing is really easy or drama free anymore. It took long enough to sink in... :)

Good night to all - love to everyone!

Chubby Cheeks for Mother's Day

2008-05-12T21:35:00.002-06:00

Poor Daniel! He took this picture of himself Saturday morning right after he woke up. He was so sure this wisdom teeth stuff would be no big deal. He didn't even want to take Advil. But he soon changed his tune.

It looks a lot worse than it is - but his cheeks were pretty swollen. We should have gotten Sam and Dan together when her lips were swollen - what a Christmas card that would be...

The weekend was a nice one for the most part. Daniel just watched some movies, played some video games and took it easy.

I did some housework and grocery shopping. Jeremy's ankle is still a bit achy but he had the doctor check again now that the swelling is down and it is not broken - good news but we all stayed close to home.

Sunday was a beautiful day. The weather was perfect. Jeremy and I worked out in the yard for the most part - Isabella played and Sam sat out and kept us company. I turned all the soil in the garden to prepare for planting and Jeremy made me a new planter box for the back yard for my herb garden.

Once that was done I went shopping - yahoo! I didn't have a chance to start seeds in Feb. so I decided I would just buy some seedlings. I had to go to 3 different places to get everything I wanted. We decided that along with tomatoes and peppers, we would try broccoli and cauliflower this year as well. Then of course I needed an assortment of herbs for my new garden and some annuals for the front garden.

Samantha and Isabella and I hit the first few stores together then we had to drop Isabella off for the remainder. It was getting close to nap time and a tired Izi in a busy store just isn't good for anyone.

Once we made it home, Jeremy cooked dinner and Samantha made this baked pineapple for desert that was wonderful. While it was cooking I started planting. It never fails - every time I am at a nursery or garden store - my eyes are bigger than my wallet. ;)

I came home with so many plants... Needless to say I still have many left to plant. I was going to do some on my lunch hour today, but a cold front is moving in and there is snow in the forecast. Can you believe it? Only in Colorado - in all the years I have been here - Mother's Day is usually safe for planting. I am hoping that the plants that made it into the ground yesterday can take the cold. I didn't get to the garden so those plants safely in for the night as well as the rest of the annuals I didn't have a chance to plant.

Daniel's cheeks are deflating as we speak - he didn't make it to school today but he should be fine for tomorrow. I think the percasett didn't agree with him. It made him feel ok - but he had nightmares and didn't sleep well. He wouldn't take them at all on Sunday.

Well it is late - I can't believe that it may snow tomorrow - I love the moisture - but I would like some warmer weather.

Take care - Love to everyone!

Full House

2008-05-09T21:00:00.003-06:00

Daniel had his wisdom teeth removed this morning. It all went well and now he is playing video games with a friend. Isabella has a friend over as well playing dolls and Samantha is chilling eating ice cream and reading her latest People magazine with one of her friends.

Is anyone counting? That is 6 kids - ages 3 to 16. When Daniel's friend arrived around 6pm - I asked him if he was hungry and needed anything to eat since the kids were eating their dinners. His answer was no I am fine - just had dinner. Since then he has eaten Hot Cheetos, a cheese burrito, chips, 2 ice cream bars, a Popsicle and then decided that he and Daniel should make cupcakes. If I didn't have to go to the grocery store before, I do now...

It is wonderful to have a house full. This is how it should be. All the kids gabbing around the table.

Today was a better day - the weather was wonderful - sunny and mild. I am excited for this weekend - I am going to plant my garden and play with my house plants.

I will take some pictures and share on Sunday.

Until then - Happy Mother's Day to every mom out there - I hope you get many many hugs from your children and can relax or do what ever you want at least on Sunday.